The Mothman Coffee – Cryptid Caffeination
The Mothman never sleeps. He’s too busy flying around terrorizing people in the backwoods of West Virginia. Dude is wired. He’s like one cup of coffee away from getting busted by the police cuz he’s pleasuring himself against a telephone pole one moonlit night, while cooing softly, then hissing when the officer approaches. Just look at his eyes. He’s crazy caffeinated. Now you can go all Mothman too thanks to The Mothman Coffee. You may not get accosted by the Mothman, but you will be so f**ked up, you will feel like you were. Warning: You may wake up in a ditch on the side of the road naked and hear reports of Mothman sightings from the night before when you walk back into town.