Nothing Says Luvin Like Possum In The Oven
Canned roadkill. It’s what’s for dinner. It’s Mmmmm Mmmmm good, drenched in a thick coon fat gravy sauce. So delicious and nutritious! I don’t want to hear any whining. Eat it up boys and girls and please ask for seconds because mama bought the economical family size on Ebay for y’all.
“Ingredients: Fresh from the highways of Interstate 10, Interstate 12, Highway 90, Highway 190 and Highway 11. Prime road kill possum cooked to perfection with wild ramps and greens, boiled sweet potatoes simmered in coon fat gravy. For best results: serve cold, while still greasy.”
“The Bacowza corporation, a Master Purveyor of fresh Possum, Nutria, and Coon in the South. Supplier to New Orleans finest restaurants. We highly recommend that our Possum products are served with Red wine, and not White wine.”
Now, if you’re thinking, “oh noooo…I just went on a diet and can’t possibly be eating something that rich and laden with saturated fats.” Worry no longer. There’s canned diet possum, just for you health nuts, with 80% less grease. So, forget your Jenny Craig and Weight Watchers and just stock the shelves with this low cal/low fat stuff and you’ll be on your way to a lean waistline in no time.