evil mystery itemHere at Creepbay, we love sharing with you the things that not only creep us out, but hopefully will give you the creeps and a few nightmares too. Sometimes we run across something creepy that isn’t a “thing”, but a person instead. In this case, it’s Ebay seller hubby2you. The name isn’t all that scary…pretty nice and normal. Brings up the image of maybe a handyman selling some tools on Ebay for some extra beer money. But, noooooo…hubby2you is not some nice, mild mannered Mr. Fix It. He is quite the opposite and has a wickedly good dark streak. Don’t take our word for it. Prepare to be creeped…

evil mystery itemHere is his highly disturbing Ebay ad for a 666 Dollar Mystery Item…Our hats off to this guy for originality and his twisted sense of humor:

This mystery item will perplex even the most intellectual minds. It may even offend the unoffendable. This treasure you will receive is three times worse than your worst possible idea of what it could possibly be. In addition to your winnings and only by special request someone I know will also provide the buyer a free 15 minute severely humiliating phone call and one year of monthly reoccurring “anti-friendship” letters including a small crudely drawn picture of them being subjected to severe degradation, intimidation, humiliation, and forced prostitution by rappers and street hustlers. Be careful what you wish for.

TIME IS RUNNING SHORT DO NOT LET THIS TREASURE PASS YOU BY MAKE AN OFFER NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ONE DAY LEFT FOR THE ULTIMATE PINNACLE OF HELLISH WINNINGS!!! IF YOU ONLY KNEW WHAT THIS MYSTERY SALE TRULY BEHOLDS YOU WOULD SLAY THOUSANDS OF INNOCENT JUST TO VIEW ITS SICKENING DEMONIC ALL OMNIPRESENT CONTENTS AND SELL YOUR OWN SOUL TO BREATHE THE AIR THAT HAS TOUCH AIR NEXT TO IT!!!!!!! BUY NOW OR SUFFER THE INCONCEIVABLE ETERNITY OF NEVER KNOWING THE TRUE FACE OF THE UNKNOWN MYSTERY ITEM FROM HELL!!!!!!!!!!! WAKE UP PEOPLE THIS IS IT NOW OR NEVER!!!!IN THE END THERE WILL BE ONLY ONE!!!!!PICTURE THAT IS, DURING THE FINAL HOUR OR SO OF THIS AUCTION I WILL BE FORCED BY POWERS UNFATHOMABLY GREATER THEN ALL OF US PUT TOGETHER TO REVEAL A SHOCKING YET ELUSIVE MODERN DAY PHOTOGRAPH THAT GIVES RISE TO THE ACTUAL TRUE NATURE OF THE MYSTERY ITEM!!!!!! PUT THIS ON YOUR WATCH LIST AND SHOW DUE DILIGENCE, AND YOU MAY POSSIBLE BE ABLE TO GUESS THE GREATEST GIFT EVER GIVEN UNTO MAN!!!!!!!! ONE HINT I WILL TELL YOU NOW IN THE FORM OF A RIDDLE!!!!!!! ~MAN AND BEAST ARE SLAIN ALIKE~THE TWO ARE THE SAME THAT WIELD THE KNIFE~ THAT IS ALL FOR NOW!!!!!!!!!! REMEMBER TO PUT THIS AUCTION ON YOUR WATCH LIST! !!!!!!!!!

AS OF NOW MY FELLOW EBAYERS I HAVE DONE EVERYTHING IN MY LONG LIST OF MORTAL ABILITIES TO SHOW YOU THE TRUE FACE OF OBJECTS OFFERED IN THIS ONE OF A KIND PROLIFIC AUCTION!!!! AS I PROMISED I HAVE POSTED PHOTOS THAT ARE BUT MERE PARTS OF THE PUZZLE OF “MYSTERY ITEM”. UNFORTUNATELY EBAY WORKS ON THE ANCIENT BABYLONIAN MONETARY SYSTEM, AND WILL NOT ALLOW ME TO ACCEPT SOULS AS PAYMENT (PAYPAL HAS ALSO EXPRESSED ITS DELUSIONAL OPINIONS TO ME ON THAT MATTER) SO BID WELL AND OFFER WHAT YOU MAY AND ON THE END WE WILL SEE WHO “BECOMES ONE” WITH THIS THE UNIVERSES ULTIMATE PRIZE!!!!!!!

Oh my….such passion in his fevered sales pitch- just look at all those exclamation marks and SCREAMING CAPS!!!!!! Too bad nobody bid. We might have, if he had put a decimal in between the 6’s, starting it out for $6.66 instead of $666. LOVE the comment about Ebay working on “the ancient Babylonian monetary system” and not accepting souls as payment. If this guy was the devil, he would have us laughing our heads off all the way to the fiery pits of hell.