Something wicked this way comes. Shhhhhhhh.It’s my ex-wife. I’m pretending I’m not home. But something cool is also coming. 8-Bit Horror Villains From Funko. This series features Freddy Krueger, Jason Voorhees and a Xenomorph. I can’t wait to see who else they add in the future. I would buy them myself, but the ex-wife just found me and she left with my money. Sad face.
Posts Tagged alien
This Ashton-Drake Alien Baby Doll reminds me of that time I was sleeping in my bed and some female alien shows up with an alien baby.I’m all like, “I ain’t paying intergalactic child support. What do you mean why? Maybe cuz you showed up in my room, abducted me, wrecked my poop-maker and then had your way with me? What? No, I don’t want visitation rights-” Then I woke up with missing time and a sore nipple. I think I was nursing an alien baby with my man mammories. Weird.
This Realistic Dead Alien Prop looks like it just had some bad Mexican food. Or maybe it’s dying of intergalactic constipation. Actually, I just noticed that it’s clutching it’s alien groin-junk. So it could just be that I stumbled on some alien erotica and that’s not agony, but ecstasy. And now I feel weird. It must be good if it curls those toes. You go alien! You do you!
*Walking along a field. Spots a cop circle. Checks it against my Alien Crop Circle Necklace.* Oh yeah. That’s alien alright. I think it means, “We came from Uranus”. Wait, that’s a mistranslation. It means, “We come for your anus!” Big difference there. Also, “To Serve Man” is a cookbook. This necklace is stunning and stylish, with an important message for mankind, which I have just deciphered for you. You’re welcome.
This Alien In Bigfoot Costume Metal Wall Art should really come with a spoiler alert, even though I think we all knew this already. Aliens are Bigfoot. There, I said it. This piece of art proves it. See, this way they get to not only scare people in the woods, but then they can jump out of their Bigfoot suit and go rape bums in their fancy UFOs. Life is weird like that.