This UFO Abducting A Cow Christmas Ornament with Light and Sound is going to abduct your Christmas and give it a thorough examination right up its chimney. It features lights, fiber optics, and a sound chip. The UFO lights up and makes a ray gun sound as it abducts that one Earthly beast. Sadly there’s no farmer to shoot his shotgun into the air and shake his fist, but I still think it’s cool.
Posts Tagged cow
This Color Changing UFO Mug shows a cow abduction in progress when you add hot liquid. It’s a cautionary mug. Especially if you’re a cow. A good reminder to get your eyes off of that smartphone and look up. Cuz you never know when they are coming for you. Like I always say, “Keep your eyes peeled so’s your butt don’t have to heal.” Words to live by. I also say, “Look to the stars, while they’re looking toward Uranus!”
I’m not sure why anyone would want Purified Cow’s Urine. Or PCU as I am sure they refer to it in the cow urine biz. Supposedly it “improves digestion and intelligence” among other things.
If you say so.
You know what else improves digestion and intelligence? Eating some fruit while reading a book! If it really improved intelligence, guys like Albert Einstein and Stephen Hawking would be underneath a cow all the time, trying to get smarter so they can solve the mysteries of the universe. But guess what? You can’t solve the mysteries of the universe with cow golden showers!
We all know that humans and cows are being abducted by aliens. It’s no secret. That’s why they are now putting UFOs abducting cows on milk bottles. This cool concept design for Molocow milk makes every serving of milk a recreation of a terrifying cow abduction. They say it’s fun for kids. I say it is terrifying for cows. I do like the cool flying saucer bottle caps though.
It’s all fun and games until that beam of light hits you and lifts you up into the mothership and violates your privates, whether you are a cow or a human. I hope they actually put this on their bottle though. I’m sure they will milk the idea for all it’s worth. If you think UFOs are utter nonsense, think again.
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This Zombie Cow Butter Dish is utterly amazing. see what I did there? Did you know butter is made from milk. I can’t believe it’s not utter. Heh. Let’s see how many utterly useless utter jokes I can make about this awesomely weird butter dish. I can’t believe I’m about to utter this, but I admit that I love it. More of a pork chop guy though. You know, the utter white meat. I could go on all day, but you don’t want that and neither do I. That would be an utter travesty.