The Krampus With Child Statue makes for a classically horrifying bit of Christmas decoration. Damn Krampus. Control yourself and get your tongue back in your mouth. You gonna throw that sacked up kid in a lake or drown him with your saliva? Poor kid. Look at him. He’s all dressed up with his good shirt, has a tie on, little guy wanted to look good for Christmas. Then this happens. You know the bottom of that sack is full of poop too, the only question is how much.
Posts Tagged figurine
This skeleton looks mad as hell. Like he’s having trouble dropping his payload. So he decided to check out the internet on an old ass big laptop. Yep, Skeletons On The Toilet Figurines are a thing. I need this for my shelf. It’s a reminder to have more fiber in your diet if nothing else, whether you’re a skeleton or not. I think he needs the Squatty Potty.
There’s nothing like being mesmerized by a Hula Girl on your dashboard. Unless it’s this Zombie Hula Girl Bobble Figurine. Umm, yeah the ones I remember were more sexy. Less scabby. No open wounds. Still, I wouldn’t kick her off my dashboard for eating crackers. Let’s see you hula baby. Dance and shake your money maker. Oh sh*t. Did I just crash? Why is everything so blurry and peaceful? White light? Go toward what white light? Ohhhhhh there it is.
Just cuz it is the day of the dead, that doesn’t mean that the day is all dead. Even if it has been a pretty dead day. Just a deep thought for the day. Anyhow, these Day Of The Dead Style Statues are awesome. They started off as religious statues, but soon lost their religion like REM and got awesome Day of the Dead makeovers! I picture some dude in his studio just looking at all of his statues. He is silent. Then he suddenly shouts, “MAKEOVER!” and gets to work. Consider me dia de los muert-ified.
Wahhhh wahhhhh! Baby Cthulhu‘s crying is driving me insane! I think he needs his diaper changed. I thought you were supposed to be an elder god, not an infant crybaby. Maybe you’re an elder tot. I have no idea. All I know is, I ain’t changing that diaper. Smells like you just took a radioactive dump. No wonder you glow in the dark.
I heard they picked you up from day care early the other day cuz you Chernobyl-ed the place with a flaming log. Ground zero is your britches man! Are your parents getting home soon? Cuz I have an appointment to go babysit baby Frankenstein at nine. His parents are going to the opera. Then I have to swing by a 1/4 Werewolf kids house and watch him while his parents go crazy on the full moon tonight. This whole monster babysitting gig is not nearly as cool as I thought it would be. Okay fine, I’ll remove the diaper and dip you in the toilet with a pair of tongs, and flush a couple of times, but I ain’t cleaning you. God, that’s foul! Cool your tentacles while I get my hazmat suit. Your folks are paying extra next time.