What is that smell? Damn Freddy! Now I smell why they call you a nightmare on elm street. You rank son! Here, try this Nightmare On Elm Street Freddy Krueger Soap. You might want to wash that sweater and hat once in awhile too. You smell like you look. Like a trucker’s rest stop bathroom in hell. Just go over there. Further. Further. Is this a dream? Cuz you smell real. Real nasty! Get outta here Freddy and don’t come back until your ass is clean.
Posts Tagged movie
Check out this sweet Creature From The Black Lagoon Block Print. Now you can display one of the coolest movie monsters on your wall. Also one of the slimiest and smelliest. Very fishy. Here he is messing with a ship’s anchor. During a storm. It’s how Gilligan and crew got shipwrecked. True story. Hey if this guy were in the cast it would have been GILL-igan’s Island. Get it? Bad joke? Gil-ty as charged!
Hey, it’s the monster that wrecked Tokyo. And I ain’t talking Fukushima! What? Too soon? My bad. This cool Godzilla Wallet belongs in your pocket. It shows Godzilla on the rampage, breathing fire. It also shows Godzilla’s anatomy as if he got hit with a laser. I can see he had chicken for dinner, along with a butt-load of Japanese locals and tourists.
I say butt-load cuz it looks like they are gonna hurt coming out. Depending on his digestion anyway. I’d be backed up for a week. That meal is too rich. Get it? Too rich? Cuz ya have to be rich to travel and be a tourist these days.
This Nightmare On Elm Street Never Sleep Again Necklace looks just like Freddy Krueger’s sweater and even has a little gravestone underneath. I don’t see what the big deal is. I had a nightmare on elm street once and yeah it was terrifying, but guess what? I moved. I didn’t make like 10 sequels about it. You make your own destiny. Like me. For a while I was starring in “Drunk on Church Street”. Then I moved on to “Recovering on Maple.” I move around a lot. Now I’m all about, “F*ck it. Face down on Main”. We are all our own master. Reach for the stars. And when ya can’t, reach for the bottle.
Sadly these Friday The 13th Socks don’t actually make a sound, but once someone reads the bottom, they know what it means. Huh? It’s the sound that Jason Voorhees makes ya dork. Fun fact: It’s also the sound that I make during sexy time. Which is why my lovers have to wear headphones. Now why they also need a blindfold I have no idea.