So that happened. Now you know what it looks like when an alien takes a relaxing bath. It looks like this may be the elusive Cheeto species of alien, so I’m surprised he didn’t dissolve in the water. Anyway, now you can own your very own Alien In A Tub Figurine. The water even glows under a black light. I’m glad his Cheeto alien privates are underwater. I don’t need to be seeing an alien Cheeto d**k! Hmmm. Maybe that’s what a bag of Cheetos is: just a big bag of alien d**ks! Let that sink in.
Posts Tagged sculpture
Handsy the Hobo Spider freaks me out. Probably cuz it combines my two greatest fears, hobos and spiders. He’s got a cool little top hat and a nice set of teeth, a cigar. Keep your hands to yourself handsy. No, I can’t spare some change. You’re a spider, go eat something for free.
On the 4th day of Christmas my true love gave to me…4 Malformed Fetal Skeleton Specimens. (And she wonders why I divorced her.) Or as I like to call them, Teenage Mutant Ninja Fetuses. You see that dude in the glass ball/lens thing there? Yeah, these guys are summoning him to be their next sacrifice, after which they will have a movie deal, appear in some video games and then abuse drugs and fade into obscurity.
Damn! That’s a face that only a mother could love. And if you are a mother with a kid that looks like this? You both ugly and must have been beat by a hundred ugly sticks. Hang this 3D Framed Zombie Face up on the wall near your front door and any thieves that break in will run away screaming and searching for therapy. Ultimately it will make them a better person, but they will be scarred for life.
The Krampus With Child Statue makes for a classically horrifying bit of Christmas decoration. Damn Krampus. Control yourself and get your tongue back in your mouth. You gonna throw that sacked up kid in a lake or drown him with your saliva? Poor kid. Look at him. He’s all dressed up with his good shirt, has a tie on, little guy wanted to look good for Christmas. Then this happens. You know the bottom of that sack is full of poop too, the only question is how much.