The Krampus With Child Statue makes for a classically horrifying bit of Christmas decoration. Damn Krampus. Control yourself and get your tongue back in your mouth. You gonna throw that sacked up kid in a lake or drown him with your saliva? Poor kid. Look at him. He’s all dressed up with his good shirt, has a tie on, little guy wanted to look good for Christmas. Then this happens. You know the bottom of that sack is full of poop too, the only question is how much.
Posts Tagged statue
It’s Jack Skellington! This Nightmare Before Christmas Jack and Zero Keyper Figure is a cool statue of Jack and Zero, with a cool twist. Cuz it also holds your keys. This way you will always know where your keys are and you won’t lose them. Is it Halloween? Is it Christmas? I have no friggin idea what this movie is trying to say, but I like the pretty pictures flying by my eyes. This statue is going to look sweet on your mantle. Even I couldn’t lose my keys with this statue nearby.
Looks like we have some gnome-napping action happening here. I’ve seen this before. They are gonna tie that garden gnome up in some dark basement and demand a ransom from some old lady in a moo-moo whose life isn’t complete with her garden gnome. Gargoyles and gnomes are natural enemies, despite the fact that one sticks to the garden and the other perches on roof corners. Man, I hope the lady pays the ransom and they don’t off that gnome as an example. Bigfoot also likes to kidnap gnomes.
This Life-Sized Bigfoot Statue has some big feet, I guarantee it. This is exactly what I need to scare my neighbors. The mythical beast can now be in your yard, minus the foul stench and occasional sasquatch poo. Now you can have an encounter every night. Just go out to your yard. Just don’t let the real Bigfoot see this. They don’t take too kindly to imposters/
When one mythical creature starts kidnapping other mythical creatures, you know things are bad, as evidenced by this Bigfoot Kidnapping Gnomes Statue. Technically it’s gnome-napping. Which is a misde-minor. Get it? Misdemeanor… Misde-minor cuz their so small. He’s probably gonna take them back to his cave or stick-hut and cook them for dinner. Maybe he just wants company too. Or slaves. Maybe he’s gonna make them build him a Bigfoot castle.