zombie handI am so ready for the Zombie apocalypse. I have 20 pounds of beef jerky, a barrel full of bacon, an industrial sized pallet of cheetos and… What? Ammunition? Guns? I knew there was something I forgot. Oh well. You gotta have priorities and snacks are the first. Diabetes second.

Anyway, once you cut the hand off of one zombie bastid and display it on your wall, they tend to chill and stop harassing you. Much like Jehovah witnesses and Mormons at your door. That’s what I’m hoping anyway. If I buy this $300 zombie hand, mounted and pre-restrained(Because you know it is going to wiggle and crawl for all eternity) I’ll be good to go.

Maybe I can let it loose occasionally and watch it squirm and dance. Play that crazy knife game with it. You know, the one guys like Rambo do real fast and crazy like, but when I try, I take a trip to the E.R. Yeah, this is perfect for that.