steampunk heartI wasn’t sure what this thing was at first. Turns out it is a “steampunk heart”. I wish I had known that before I ordered one and started wearing it.

I just thought it looked cool and made me all steampunk/gangster. You know, stangster! I thought it might be a steampunk pizza slice with some stitched up lady parts in the middle and the number 1 on it. Don’t I feel stupid. It’s a heart! A wounded heart. Now I see it.

I was all like, “Check out my pizza vag”. Everyone else was all like, “Yeah you ARE the #1 vag bro!” and “Having some surgery bro?” Or “Dude, I would take a slice of that!”. Now I am disappointed. I’ll have to find a new pendant.