Check out this Crazy Five-Eyed Dog Sculpture. Give me five! Hahaha. I used to have a dog with five eyes and it really isn’t funny. He got old and cost me a friggin’ fortune at Lenscrafters. Finally got him some sweet mirrored sunglasses. He looked like he had a solar panel on his head. I’m just saying, I know what these dogs are like.

Go fetch. He’s like fetch what? I see stuff on both sides of my head and from up above. Human jerk. Dog had so many eyes I named him Mississippi River. Had to add the river because Mississippi only has four I’s. Then he decided to get cataracts. Naturally I had to pay five times the going rate. Then I cried a Mississippi River and told the vet to end my suffering by ending that five eyed freak! I’m still paying for it. TWO eyes people. Have pets with two eyes! Can’t stress that enough.
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