Tour de Lawn: Custom Built Lawn Mower Bike

custom lawn mower bikeThis $375 custom built lawn mowing bike has one of those old-style bladed push mowers attached in front, so you can zip around the neighborhood mowing lawns in a crazy short time. You’ll be making bank son! Rolling in them Benjamins. Choppin’ the grass and gettin’ dat ass. Rollin’ in the cheddar! Big pimpin son.

Until your legs flare up like 2 sausages and your butt cheeks are 2 big calluses. It was fun while it lasted, but you are in so much pain, you don’t even mind when some dude riding a John Deere does a drive-by and knocks you off of your smooth pimp ride. Now there is a new king in town. Lawn wars be crazy like that.
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Live Fast, Die Weird: Full Face Clown Motorcycle Helmet

Full Face Clown Motorcycle HelmetThis custom painted full faced clown motorcycle helmet is made to order. As soon as you pay your $600, one will be freshly painted just for you by Ebay seller alera.of.thailand. Good thing too, because my badass biker gang needs a new theme. You can only get in so much trouble calling yourselves Hell’s Oompa Loompas before you have to change your approach. Everyone is on the lookout for green hair and suspenders now, worried about getting a beatdown with a lollipop. Gotta lay low for awhile. Do some stretches. Work on my height.

This clown helmet is creepy and badass. More images after the break, plus some other badass helmets from the seller.
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