The Wedding Ring Casket is a tiny casket that symbolizes the death of your marriage. Just put your ring inside and and bury your wedding ring after you get divorced. If you ever want to get married again you’re basically a grave robber, cuz I don’t know about you, but I’m not buying a brand new wedding ring for a jillion dollars when I have a perfectly good one buried in the backyard between a parakeet and two turtles.

I’m not married, but I bought the ring like 20 years ago for when I meet the right girl. I think I’m just gonna bury it now and save myself some trouble. Hey, if I bury this thing and a worm crawls in the ring, are we married? I think that might be legally binding. Also, it would mean I have worms. That doctor was so right and all I did was yell and demand my lollipop while rubbing my butt against the floor. I knew if I waited long enough SOMETHING would worm it’s way into my heart.