Spider Coasters Make You Want To Slam Your Glass Down Hard
ACK! Kill it! *Slams glass down on the spider, sending grape soda everywhere, mostly in my face!* Oh Jesus! *Puts hand to chest to steady my heart.* Why did I think that spider coasters were a good idea?

*Looks down at my glass.* ACK! Spider in my drink! *Throws glass against the wall where it shatters.* Thank god! *Looks where the glass used to be, Sees spider coaster.* ACK! It was under my drink! *Runs to the fridge, gets another glass, fills it with beer, runs back, slams glass on spider, screams because the spider is still there. Breaks down sobbing.* Why? Why? Why?