
Peanut Butter And Jelly Socks. My motto is, “Comfort food makes comfortable clothing”. That’s probably why I just found a spare hot dog in my shirt pocket. *Yeah, whatever. Is that cake in your underpants?* No, but it is homemade.
Anyway, guess what time it is? It’s Peanut Butter Jelly time. *Dances around in my PB and J socks. Stopping to grab a knife so I can spread some peanut butter and jelly on the appropriate socks, then gets back to dancing, crushing slices of bread everywhere and making like a hundred sandwiches all mashed up together.*
*Breathing hard. Leaning against the wall.* Peanut…butter…Jelly…tired now. *Falls on sticky white bread dance floor*
Seems wrong, but some people really get off on their veggies, to the point of taking them into their bed and- *Hands on face Home Alone style* -sleeping with them. Relax Vegans, Vegetarians and Vulva-sharians, I’m just talkin’ bout snuggling the carrot, not waxing it. This giant carrot body pillow is crazy.