Tag: notes

Let’s Make This Brief Underwear Notes

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

Let’s Make This Brief Underwear Notes
Leave notes on a pair of underwear. Let’s make this brief Underwear Notes. People pay attention to a note on a pair of tightie whities. Other notes? They just crumple up and throw them away. Although I think they should have some yellow stains and look a little crusty. Maybe have some fried chicken grease. You know, just for realism. Maybe that’s just me. Perfect for notes like: PICK UP SOME UNDERWEAR! or CRAPPED MYSELF: JUST FYI or WE NEED MILK, DON”T BE A WIENER! then draw a picture of a wiener escaping the undies cuz you’re totally grown up, but it has to be done.

People always ask me, boxers or briefs? And I say I prefer my boxers in briefs, otherwise both fighters are gonna have two dangling arms hitting each other below the belt. I don’t really wanna see that. It’s already too much man on man action for me.

Salami Notes

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

salami notes
Yeah, I used to use these Salami Notes for all kinds of things. I would write myself notes, leave messages for others, tell random strangers to get bent, but I don’t use ’em anymore. They just aren’t worth the trouble. People get real offended whenever the salami comes out. Like that time my female boss asked me for some sales figures.

No problem boss lady, I’ll just write you a note on my salami and slide it in your box nice and easy.

*slap* Pack up your desk right now you filthy disgusting maggot.

Or that time a co-worker asked me if I had any post-its.

No, but I’ll give ya my salami. Just go easy on it. It’s not like you can get this kind of meat in the Deli.

*BAM! Heel to the toe*

Then there was Bertha the hairy mole-faced janitor with hog breath.

Sure I got something to write on. How about you take my salami? Say, why are we going in the supply closet? No need to pin my arms done! Oh dear God! No, keep the lights off. Why? Why?

*shudders*