Wait- There’s a Giant Sugar Skull Beach Blanket? Oh, I see it now. Take your skull to the beach and lay out in the sun in style. This will get the party started. Whether you’re laying on the beach in Mexico or chilling in the backyard, this Dias de Los Muertos beach blanket will help you celebrate the day. Sun, fun and skulls, that’s what makes a nice relaxing day. It measures 5 feet across. Never leave the house without your skull that’s what I always say.
Posts Tagged perpetual kid
Leave notes on a pair of underwear. Let’s make this brief Underwear Notes. People pay attention to a note on a pair of tightie whities. Other notes? They just crumple up and throw them away. Although I think they should have some yellow stains and look a little crusty. Maybe have some fried chicken grease. You know, just for realism. Maybe that’s just me. Perfect for notes like: PICK UP SOME UNDERWEAR! or CRAPPED MYSELF: JUST FYI or WE NEED MILK, DON”T BE A WIENER! then draw a picture of a wiener escaping the undies cuz you’re totally grown up, but it has to be done.
People always ask me, boxers or briefs? And I say I prefer my boxers in briefs, otherwise both fighters are gonna have two dangling arms hitting each other below the belt. I don’t really wanna see that. It’s already too much man on man action for me.
Oh nuts. I’ll keep this brief. Ha. Get it? If we have Squirrel In Underpants Air Fresheners, do you think squirrels have human in underpants air fresheners? At least this air freshener will smell better than your average squirrel. There’s that.
The squirrels around my area are more the boxer type. They don’t like briefs. Hey, boxers or briefs, what does it matter as long as you have a place to store your nuts? Am I right guys?
Some guys need like 40 drinks until they have their beer goggles on. Me? I just wear these I’d Tap That Beer Goggles while entering the place. I’m not picky. You know it and I know it. Let’s do this thing.
But if you still need like a keg to turn me into Ryan Gosling I understand. I’ll just wait somewhere you can’t see me until you are good and drunk, then I’ll introduce myself and we will meet again for the first time. Cool?
Snakes. Why’d it have to be snakes? They make me hiss-terical! This Slithering Snake Cling Ring is all needy and clingy like a girlfriend. I kid. I’m the clingy one in a relationship. Holding onto a woman’s leg while she drags me and tries to get away is just an evolutionary trait that I have developed to not be so lonely.
This terrifying snake will realistically coil around your index finger in the same way, while chomping on your ring finger. Cuz it’s jealous and doesn’t want you wearing any other rings. So don’t! Respect the snake!