Guys, you have to find a spider-mate. I mean soulmate. There’s got to be a black widow out there that needs a widower. Weave yourself a nice web with this Spider Web Tie and you might just attract a mate. I mean, yeah, she’ll probably still bite your head off after sex some day and leave your corpse on the bed as she packs her stuff and moves onto the next victim…. Maybe just go for a Brown recluse instead. Oh wait, those are bad too. Maybe it’s okay to just be single.
Tag: spider web
Spider Web Cardigan
Oh what a tangled web you weave. In your wardrobe. This Spider Web Cardigan is gonna catch some flies. And by flies, I mean men. And by men, I mean me. Hubba hubba. Spider girl, you make my heart whirl. Are you a Black Widow or a Recluse? Cuz if you’re a recluse we could just go back to your place. Heh. That’s just a little spider joke. Your place? Cool. Uh, I couldn’t help but notice all of the decapitated heads of your past mates, which I just tripped over on the way in. This may have been a bad idea.
Spiderweb Lace Bra
Oh what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive! Cuz you told me you were a C cup! It’s cool. We’re good. It’s all webbing under the boob bridge now. Anyway, this Spiderweb Lace Bra is scary and sexy. I never understood why women need so many bras. I mean, do you really need a bra for doing push ups? What I don’t know about bras could fill a book. That’s cuz I still haven’t cracked Victoria’s secret. Know what I mean bra?
Embroidered Spider Web Necklace
Looking for a cute necklace cuz you are a spider-loving spider queen? Look no further than this Embroidered Spider Web Necklace. You know that Spider-Man would get one for his main spider squeeze and if it’s good enough for him, it’s good enough for all of us. Are you enamored with it? Embroidered by it? Yeah, it’s pretty obvious that I don’t know how to use words. But I know a cool necklace when I see one. You’re welcome.
Gothic Spider Web Halloween Wedding Invitations
Having a wedding on All Hallows eve? These Gothic Spider Web Halloween Wedding Invitations will help. Say, why did the spider not send out any wedding invitations. Because she was a black widow. And they eat the male after sex.I think. Did I get that right? Anyway, that was a terrible joke.
I’m gonna get married on Halloween too, once a woman will have me. That way we can go trick or treating in our Wedding clothes. Do you have any idea how much candy a wedding dress will hold? Of course it has to come off of the bride first. Then they will complain for years how all of those Snickers bars and Kit Kats ruined her precious wedding dress. Waaa waaa waaa. Shouldn’t have been wearing white anyway, if you know what I mean.
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