Tag: bra

Bat Crop Top – Holy Bat Boobies!

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Bat Crop Top - Holy Bat Boobies!
Now that’s what I call Creep Wear. This Bat Crop Top is the ultimate in boobie-covering technology. God, I wish I was that bat. You would be the wind beneath my wings. The wind is very nipply today, so let me hold you tighter, my love. Is it technically a bra? A halter top? Crop top? Bat brazier? I have no idea, but I know it is a bat made to protect your jubblies. And boy, does it look sexy. Whether you are headed for the convenience store, at the beach, or living during the apocalypse, this bat crop top will always look amazing. Bat boobs are always in fashion, after all. Let’s face it they are probably the two greatest things in existence.

Gotta be a B cup, too cuz it’s a Bat. I’m just guessing. A bat cup, if you will. Why don’t you slip into something more comfortable and put your bat on, my dear? I’ll get the bat wine opener, and we can have a quiet night in.

That’s Dino-Sexy! – Dinosaur Bone Bra

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Dinosaur Bone Bra
Excuse me miss, I couldn’t help but notice your Dinosaur Bone Bra. I happen to be an archeologist and I wondered if I might dig in your field so to speak, in hopes of unearthing proof of the elusive Boob-asaurus Rex. *Smack* A simple No would have sufficed ma’am. No matter, the Jurassic period isn’t my favorite anyway. *Smack* Well, looks like I found a TYRANT-asaurus! *Smack* I’ll leave now cuz I’m sick of getting smacked. But science has suffered several terrible smacks this day.

Sexy and Cute Women’s Sugar Skull Bra

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Sexy Women's Sugar Skull Bra
Whoa! Nice sugar skulls! This Sexy Women’s Sugar Skull Bra makes your tattas look a bit more terrifying. Cute though. You must have a “see” cup cuz i see and I can’t look away. But once I do, I will have a lifetime of mammaries to look back on fondly. That’s some Victoria’s secret right there. And the secret is skeletons in your closet. They have skulls all over and rhinestone detailing. Also check out this zombie eyes bra.
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Spiderweb Lace Bra

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Spiderweb Lace Bra
Oh what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive! Cuz you told me you were a C cup! It’s cool. We’re good. It’s all webbing under the boob bridge now. Anyway, this Spiderweb Lace Bra is scary and sexy. I never understood why women need so many bras. I mean, do you really need a bra for doing push ups? What I don’t know about bras could fill a book. That’s cuz I still haven’t cracked Victoria’s secret. Know what I mean bra?

Zombie Eyes Bra

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Zombie Eyes Bra
Hey baby! Nice Zombie Eyes. This Zombie Eyes Bra will get you all kinds of attention. Know what I mean, bra?

Hey, eyes up here Mister!

Actually, they’re down there. I’m just making eye contact. The Walking Dead? More like Walking D Cups. Did I ever mention that I’m a zombie optometrist. For reals! If you let me feel around I think I can cure those cataracts for you. See, the trick is to massage the zombie ocular areas until those eyes perk right up-

SMACK!

I guess that ends my career in zombie eyeballs. I wasted like 2 days getting that online degree.