These Zombie Hands Pathway Markers will light the way, but do you dare follow the path? I know I don’t want my ankles grabbed by zombie hands! Which, ironically, is what several girlfriends have told me in bed. I must have weird hands. Anyway, these zombie hands will light your way and look nice and creepy in your yard. They go well with these zombie head path markers too.
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Tag: creepy
Grow Yourself Some Sexy Woman-Shaped Peppers
I have no idea what the hell is going on here, but I like it. I like it a lot. Apparently some mad scientist has created a seed that will let you grow some peppers that are shaped like sexy woman bodies. I call it the “Pervy Pepper”. It is one voluptuous vegetable. Sexy time and gardening collide at long last. I’m gonna grow a bunch and dress them in little bikinis so I can impress my neighbors. Not this one though cuz damn!
Is This Creature a Skinwalker?
Is This Creature a Skinwalker? I have no idea. The video showed up on some dude’s Facebook page and he thinks it might be a cryptid or a skinwalker. The creature looks like it might have a trunk like an elephant, also might be a drunk bigfoot. It’s hard to tell thanks to this guy shaking the camera. Pro tip: Don’t quit meth until after you get the video, cuz withdrawal is a biatch and I can’t see cuz of your shaky 92 year old nerves. I’m just assuming. Also, don’t open your loud-ass car door and scare the thing off. It’s cuz of guys like this that we have no evidence of these creatures.
P.S. I thought I saw bong smoke when the door opened, but not sure. Which makes no sense cuz that would calm the shakes.
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Twin Peaks Owl Cave Ring – Wow Bob Wow
This Twin Peaks Owl Cave Ring is all well and good, until “Jade give two rides” and you find your arm going numb soon after. Dougie doesn’t like this! The pain! The pain! Then next thing you know some FBI agent shoots through a power outlet and you find yourself in the red room, where Mike tells you that you were created for a purpose, the proceeds to pop your head and take the golden orb that is your soul.
So basically, don’t wear the owl ring people. Never a good idea. The owls are not what they seem.
Cool and Creepy Zombie Apocalypse Ring
Celebrate the Zombie Apocalypse with this Zombie Apocalypse Ring. Give it your your zombie girl and get engaged. Just try not to break her brittle finger when putting it on. It shows a whole bunch of graves with zombies rising out of the ground. With this ring I thee wed. Now that I think about it, marriage is like a zombie apocalypse. Everything is scary at first and there’s a lot of action. Then you just talk in grunts and are generally just slobs drooling everywhere.
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