Lace Bat Table Decor

Lace Bat Table Decor
This Lace Bat isn’t your grandmother’s doily. Unless your grandmother is Morticia Addams. If that’s the case, let me just say that your grandma is hot dude. This lace bat is great for the table, great for an end table and works just about anywhere. It looks really nice and creepy if you haven’t dusted in about 12 years, like me. *Picks up lace bat and throws it.* Fly. Fly bat! *Chokes on cloud of dust as it lands.* I wish I knew what sets off these damn allergies!

Hand Embroidery Of Saint Cthulhu

Hand Embroidery Of Saint Cthulhu
Worship at the altar of Saint Cthulhu with this Hand Embroidery Of Saint Cthulhu. It’s sacri-licious. Speaking of sainthood, what’s a guy gotta do to get sainted around here. This morning I helped an old lady across the street, later I even gave some down and out woman some money. I mean, sure, the old lady was running away from the nursing home(at a half mile per hour) and that nice lady I gave the money to was a prostitute, but still, I’m pretty sure I made both of their days.

I guess I’m gonna be a sinner and not a saint. The church never returns my letters anyway and that online petition for my sainthood only has 10 signatures and those are from my crazy cat lady neighbor and her nine cats. Not givin’ up though. I’m gonna keep rock n’ rollin’ if you keep on rock n’ rollin’. I know I can do this. We can do it together.