Bronze Bat Jewelry Cup

Bronze Bat Jewelry Cup

Awwww. Look at this cute little guy. I have to get this little bronze bat in my belfry. This Bronze Bat Jewelry Cup is a small and adorable bat with a removable head, so you can use it as a trinket box or jewelry holder. He’s holding his wings in front of him tight and looks like he’s resisting the urge to flash you. Maybe that’s just me. This little Bronze Bat Jewelry Cup is awesome. You can stash the family jewels in there for safekeeping. Not those family jewels.

And if you really go batty for bats, check out these Bat & Coffin Toilet Paper Holders. They make your bathroom a bat-room. there’s nothing wrong with that.

Bat & Coffin Toilet Paper Holders

Bat & Coffin Toilet Paper Holders

These Bat & Coffin Toilet Paper Holders will scare the s**t out of you, but the good news is that you have plenty of TP. This decor is the best way to take a creepy caca. Or a great guano. You know, what bats do. You can choose one or buy both. You’d have to be batty to not buy these awesome Bat & Coffin Toilet Paper Holders.

They will look amazing with these Gothic Bat Hand Towels if you have a bat theme. And who doesn’t? You have to have bats in your belfry. You just have to. Bats are cool! Now for a little song. *clears throat* The bats in the Belfast belfry had a bewildered and bedazzled breakfast break before Brian the brainiest began breaking bad before a beleaguered and big breasted basilisk in a busted bra bragged and belittled the bastid!

Ok. that was not so much a song as it was the mating call of a mentally ill writer. But hey, that’s a lot of B words. I have a great vocabulary. The point is that I need these pieces of bat decor in my life. It’s called the bat room not the bathroom. Deal with it.

Gothic Bat Hand Towels

Gothic Bat Hand Towels
Check out these super cool Gothic Bat Hand Towels. These look so cool. I don’t care if your bathroom is in a giant haunted mansion, an old victorian, or a trailer, these towels are going to goth up your guano room. They are great for Halloween, but I’m going to use these every day. Cuz I’m a good boy. I always wash my hands. These hand towels are soft and durable and feature an image of a bat and a crescent moon. I love it. Do you love it? Of course, you do. It’s 80% polyester, 20% cotton, and 100% awesome. Dry those hands on some Gothic Bat Hand Towels after you wash them. And if you don’t pick some of these up? Then you better dry your eyes with something else because you’ll be crying at the missed opportunity. I just love that design. Speaking of great design, check out this cool Bat crop top.

Bat Crop Top – Holy Bat Boobies!

Bat Crop Top - Holy Bat Boobies!
Now that’s what I call Creep Wear. This Bat Crop Top is the ultimate in boobie-covering technology. God, I wish I was that bat. You would be the wind beneath my wings. The wind is very nipply today, so let me hold you tighter, my love. Is it technically a bra? A halter top? Crop top? Bat brazier? I have no idea, but I know it is a bat made to protect your jubblies. And boy, does it look sexy. Whether you are headed for the convenience store, at the beach, or living during the apocalypse, this bat crop top will always look amazing. Bat boobs are always in fashion, after all. Let’s face it they are probably the two greatest things in existence.

Gotta be a B cup, too cuz it’s a Bat. I’m just guessing. A bat cup, if you will. Why don’t you slip into something more comfortable and put your bat on, my dear? I’ll get the bat wine opener, and we can have a quiet night in.

Huge Skeleton Bat Halloween Decoration

Huge Skeleton Bat Halloween Decoration
Tis the season to be creepy. Fa la la la la la la la la. This Huge Skeleton Bat Halloween Decoration is exactly what you need to scare the neighbors and all of the trick-or-treaters this All Hallows Eve. Who needs a wreath on the door when you can have a giant freakin bat holding a dead rat trophy? The wingspan on this bad boy is 36”-39”. This baby is huge. Huge I say. Gargantuan even. And the wings are actually movable. The seller says that when they put a fan on, the wings even flutter in the wind! How cool is that? This is the perfect décor for ye old haunted house on the hill.

Decorating with nightmares. It’s what we are all about around here. And this Huge Skeleton Bat Halloween Decoration is truly the stuff of nightmares. It’s gonna drive the kids batty when they show up at your door for candy this year. “Trick or tweet mistah, can I have some canda?” *Looks up at the giant freakin bat, then screams and runs.” Damn, I hope that kid has a change of pants handy. Now my porch is all wet. Good thing I have my Bat Towel Set.