Look at these guys. Getting dragged away from their video game crack habit. These Gamer Wedding Cake Toppers let you know right at the wedding that your gaming days are over. Suckers. The first step in not getting married is to avoid women. Period. Step one will help you to avoid women’s periods too. Sure, we all have an urge to spend time with the fairer sex, but that’s what rescuing Princess Peach is all about. What I’m saying is, they can’t trap you into a video game-less marriage if you stay inside and play video games all day.
Take it from me. That’s just how I roll. Of course the only downside is being 30 and having your MOM drag you away from the video games. And up the basement stairs. And paddling your backside, but that’s a whole other story. That really sucks. If you haven’t seen actual sunlight in a few weeks, that shizz hurts your eyeballs! Not to mention your heinie. Happened to me last week!
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