Tag: circus

Evil Clown Pillow

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

Evil Clown Pillow
Do you want a good night’s sleep or a good nightmare sleep? Guess which one you’re gonna get if you rest your head on this Evil Clown Pillow? If you guessed terrifying dreams that jar you awake every few minutes, complete with sleep paralysis and a lifetime of PTSD, you guessed correctly. It’s pretty terrifying.

I think I’ll pass on this one. I already have an evil clown pillow. It was that one night stand from last week that slept over and left all her makeup on my pillow in the morning. She looked great in the morning sun. The face she left behind on the pillow? Not so much. I had to wait for her to drift off again so I could stealthily look in her purse and check her driver’s license. I just wanted to make sure her name wasn’t Bozo, Bimbo, Bingo or Zippy.

*Shudders*

Etsy seller creatureog has all kinds of cool pillows, not just clowns. Check them out.

Evil Clown Skull Heels

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

Evil Clown Heels
Evil Clown Skull Heels. Nice shoes Bozo! Surprisingly they are not huge like clown shoes. According to the seller they are technically “evil clown shoes with glitter soles”. But no souls of their own until they take yours. Through your feet, which will look like a carnival of horrors.

I’m pretty sure the devil wears these. Not Prada. But won’t know until I check the wife’s shoe collection.

Trapeze Family Clothes Pins: The Amazing Pegzini Family

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

trapeze family clothes pins
Now you can be part of a heart-pounding show every time you dry your clothes. You will marvel at the death defying antics. You will be astounded by the acrobatics. You will be- Pretty damn tired from doing laundry all day. But at least you can enjoy these fun trapeze family clothing pins on your clothes line.

These guys are good. Normally I just paint happy faces on my plain wooden clothes pins, but it’s a sausage-fest cuz they are all men. You can’t draw boobs on narrow clothes pins.

Anyway, sorry Pegzini family, your career is all downhill on my clothesline. No really. My size 50 jeans alone really make it sag. Once you were acrobats, now you are just downhill racers.
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