Dog Rider Costume Harness

 dog harness costume barbarian
Sweet! Thanks to these Dog Rider Harnesses, now my dog will look really cool when I race him against the other dogs in the park. It’s not so much racing as it is my dog chasing other dogs and mounting them. It usually ends with an old woman crying and clutching a tiny shaky pooch to her chest, while my dog takes a poop of shame and then we get away through some bushes.

You can choose all kinds of dog riders: There’s a cowboy, a jockey, a mailman, a monkey, even a cat!
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Light Up Cowgirl Boots

light up cowgirl bootsThese light up cowgirl boots are perfect for a ho ho hoedown. Do you love the night life? Love to boogie? You will be the star of the show with these light up cowgirl boots. If anything happens to Rudolph this Christmas you can guide Santa’s sleigh.

Now I don’t want to look on my roof on Christmas night and see these boots up in the air with Santa’s bare ass between them. I knew I heard grunting, but it wasn’t the reindeer. WTF? You have packages to deliver. Thanks for ruining Christmas you dirty old perv.

Mom, is that you? Damn it mom, no I do not like your new boots that Santa got you! There’s another Christmas ruined!
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