So this is the Baby Sam Trick R Treat Horror Doll. I never watched the movie so I have no idea what’s up with this guy. (Was passed out with a bottle of booze in one hand while spooning a giant Hershey bar. Woke up in a chocolate/urine puddle and invented a new flavor.) Does he steal candy and kill people? I have no idea. If he stole candy, how would he even eat with his stitched up face? Dude basically has to shove it against his face, again and again, to mush it up real good so it goes through the burlap sack material, but I see no evidence of this on his un-smeared face. I really gotta watch this. Is he a midget scarecrow? Oh, that was not PC. I meant to say, is he a midget straw-person? Anyway, I’m out. I’m gonna go do today’s “pass out and wake up wet” challenge. Right after this drink.
Tag: doll
Alien In Straight Jacket Doll
Normally aliens are the one’s driving us crazy and putting us in straight jackets cuz they bugger our butts and whatnot, but this Alien In Straight Jacket Doll shows that we can turn the tables on them and drive them crazy. Butt buggering bastiches! Display this doll proudly and show them that we aren’t going to take it anymore. Enjoy your rubber room you intergalactic freak.
Baked Alien Art Doll
This Alien Art Doll is one toke over the line. Or five. Dude is totally baked. Looks like he’s drooling out of his alien talk-hole too. Whatever planet his body is on, dude’s mind is in the outer limits. Wait! What the-? Are his hands really little toes, with a toenail on each? What the deuce? This guy is totally baked and I would be too if I looked like him.
Edward Scissorhands Plush
This Edward Scissorhands Plush is much safer to have around than the real thing. I don’t need some dude whacking my ear off cuz he wanted to give me a haircut. Plus, every time he goes to flip someone the bird, he ends up slicing off a nose. Vincent Price was not the most brilliant guy. Giving someone scissors for hands is not a good idea. What was your next bright idea? Sally Syringe hands? Carl Clever C**k? What the hell is wrong with you?
Zombie Bat Doll Is Sad, Likes Sweets, May Have killed Everyone
Check this cute guy out my peeps. This Zombie Bat Doll is adorable. He looks like he’s cold. Is he shivering? And are bats supposed to have those holes in their ears? I have no idea. The seller says that he’s shy and likes sweets. And that he feels sad because he is the last one from his tribe. Hmmmmm. Could that be because… He killed them all? Just a thought. Yeah, maybe I don’t wanna let this guy in the house unless I want to end up dead and robbed of all my Kit-Kat bars.