Tag: shotgun

Guy Pulled Over For Speeding Has Alien Riding Shotgun

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

Guy Pulled Over For Speeding Has Alien Riding Shotgun
So this guy in Alpharetta, Georgia was pulled over for speeding on Sunday afternoon and guess what? Dude had an Alien riding shotgun in the car. The car was clocked at 84 mph. Duh! It takes 88 to get the alien tech known as the Flux Capacitor to kick in, so that your ride turns into a UFO and you zip on out of here. Or become one with a tree. The tech isn’t that great to be honest. Dude was just trying to get ET back to his home planet. Only 4 miles off. My heart goes out to the now stranded outer space rim-prober. Now he’s stuck with us nut jobs forever.

Only 4 miles shy. Man, that has to suck!

Shotgun Toilet Plunger

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

shotgun toilet plunger
Do you have a clogged up colon? Has this led to the plumbing in your home also having a clogged colon? First, try more fiber, then get this Shotgun Toilet Plunger. It will make short work of clogged toilets.

Plunging the clogged feces from your toilet has never been more fun. Plunge it down and pull the trigger like you’re a redneck hunting gophers. That’s how a real man clears some pipes.

BOOOOOOOOM. Toilet shatters. Poop fountain sprays everywhere. Okay, who replaced my plunger with a real shotgun? Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. But this is the third time and the landlord is getting pissed guys. Come on!