Some guy is selling what he claims is a 1966 Topps trading card of Batman on the Bat-toilet, made by Topps employees who were bored one day. Cool story bro. I’m calling BS, because I get bored plenty and I have never once drawn Batman on the toilet. The Penguin? Sure. I even drew a picture of The Joker using a urinal in Grand central station once, but- No, wait. I’m mixing up reality with recreational drug use Wednesdays again. That was just something I saw, not something I drew.
And before you ask, the answer is yes. His little Joker had white make-up on it too. I know because I was using the urinal next to him and I peeked. It’s the friggin’ Joker, you would’ve looked too! Don’t judge.
Oh hey! Just realized it’s Wednesday. Goodbye cruel world. Hello pharmaceutical and whiskey induced Virtual Reality.
Ladies and gentlemen. Live from Etsy, I present to you……Carrot Top. 
E.T. The Extra Terrestrial. My how this little guy charmed audiences back in the day. Eating Reese’s Pieces. Hiding among stuffed animals. Riding a bike in front of the moon. Back then we felt like he was our special buddy. He could make our dreams come true and cuddle with us at night. Wait. What the hell is he doing? Waxing his candle? No! Bad E.T.