Tag: time of the month

Good Ol’ Menstrual Cycle Poster

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

Good Ol' Menstrual Cycle Poster
Check out this Good Ol’ Menstrual Cycle Poster. It shows the entire cycle and explains what’s going on. My poster would have been way different. It would start with a bunch of cramping and end with a woman chasing me with a knife, while clutching a box of bon-bons in the other hand and cradling a gallon of ice cream in the crook of her arm. Then when she caught me, she would slice me on the arm just to mark me, then tell me how much she loves me and how sorry she is. Then 28 days later we would repeat it all over again. Isn’t nature wonderful?

Thanks for the tip Calyn.

Demonic Tampon Machine Demands Blood

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

tampon machineI can’t imagine anything scarier than a woman in need of a tampon who enters a public restroom only to encounter this terrifying tampon dispensing machine. This thing actually works. You can buy it for $75, fill it with tampons and hang it in a restroom somewhere, getting rich 25 cents at a time.

Until some angry and cramping PMS sufferer smashes it with a baseball bat anyway. Oh well. Was a good plan anyway.

*Angry woman busts through the door* WHO PUT THAT OFFENSIVE POS ON THE BATHROOM WALL?

*Me pointing to some random dude* It was him. He also said you look bloated. I said you have a soft glow about you. I’ll just get out of the way as you unleash your inner once-a-month-fury on him, while pretending you see your husband’s face.

Are You Bloody Crazy?: Star Trek Captain Kirk Menstrual Pad

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

captain kirk menstrual padThis Star Trek menstrual pad is ready and waiting. You decide Captain Kirk’s destiny. Will you make him the first Captain in Starfleet history to go from a gold shirt to a red shirt?

Kirk to Spock. I know we are supposed to go where no man has gone before, but I’m pretty sure other’s have been here. Personal log…It’s also…*hand gesture* very…dark…and wet. I want to beam out, but is she green? If she’s green, I’ll stay. Is that wrong? Spock? Hello?