Holy molars! I just hope this Snail Shell With Molars leaves a toothpaste snail trail, otherwise, he’s gonna have some cavities. I name him CREST-Cargot! This dude is a little gummier than I expected. They look healthy though. Way to go SLUGger. The real question is when he leaves his shell, does he take his teeth or leave them? Snails… Nature’s slimy dentures.
Tag: bizarre
Baby Sam Trick R Treat Horror Doll
So this is the Baby Sam Trick R Treat Horror Doll. I never watched the movie so I have no idea what’s up with this guy. (Was passed out with a bottle of booze in one hand while spooning a giant Hershey bar. Woke up in a chocolate/urine puddle and invented a new flavor.) Does he steal candy and kill people? I have no idea. If he stole candy, how would he even eat with his stitched up face? Dude basically has to shove it against his face, again and again, to mush it up real good so it goes through the burlap sack material, but I see no evidence of this on his un-smeared face. I really gotta watch this. Is he a midget scarecrow? Oh, that was not PC. I meant to say, is he a midget straw-person? Anyway, I’m out. I’m gonna go do today’s “pass out and wake up wet” challenge. Right after this drink.
Creepy Baby Head Candles
Holy f**k! These Creepy Baby Head Candles are some serious nightmare fuel. Oh hello, baby Hannibal Lector. Glad ya got that faceguard in so you don’t eat my flesh. Basically, you creep me the hell out so excuse me while I light your wick and watch your baby face melt. There’s also a version where the baby’s brain is exposed. I’m burning all of these down so they can’t hurt anyone ever again. It reminds me of general custer, but his head is much bigger and in a box.
Experience The Magic Of The Unicorn Fetus
This display of a Unicorn Fetus is great for those of us who are sick of seeing bright, sparkly and magical creatures prancing around the forest and nuzzling up to virgins. Well, they don’t look so sparkly when they’re fresh from their mother’s uni-gina, that’s for sure. It measures 13-14cm long and comes in a 23cm x 23cm wooden display case. Is that the afterbirth? Damn. It is. That’s included too. Now that’s a sweet collectible. I might wanna make a saddle out of that and attach it to Cleetus the fetus here so my action figures can ride it. In fact, I’m getting 4 of these things so I can play “Four fetusmen of the apocalypse”. You know things are bad when four Unicorn fetuses show up with riders.
Mythical Creatures Skeleton ID Chart
This chart doesn’t make you a medical doctor, but it gets you close. Close enough to be a cryptid vet! Study hard and you can become a doctor for mythical creatures. This Mythical Creatures Skeleton ID Chart is perfect for Halloween and your year-round vet practice. It’s handmade from premium matte photo paper and measures 12 inches wide by 18 inches tall. I gotta go. They just brought in a baby chupacabra who needs my help stat!