Guillotine Necklace: Heads Will Roll

Guillotine Necklace Heads Will Roll
Heads will roll, I mean turn, when you wear this awesome Guillotine Necklace. You should totally get a little action figure and put it’s head in this. Something innocent like E.T. or C-3PO. I hate both those guys. Is it Gee-O-Tine or Gill-O-Tine? I can never get that right. Gill-O-Tine sounds like a protein drink for fish. Pretty sure that ain’t right. Whatevs.

It’s a sharp and primitive instrument of death. For your neck.

Headless Teddy Bear Lamp

teddy bear lampThis is the latest in decapitated teddy bear decor for your kids room. It connects via USB with plug adapters and gives off a soft warm glow that is sure to give your little one nightmares.

Every night your little bundle of nerves will wake up screaming and you will rush in the room to find a new decapitated stuffed animal from his collection. You’ll ask him about it and he will tell you from trembling lips that they are the nightly sacrifice that his master demands. And that he is down to only one stuffed animal left on the shelf…

I should know. That boy was me. Still have that lamp. It’s why I buy stuffed animals in bulk. It’s also why my backyard is full of stuffed torsos with no heads.
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Decapitated Barbie Head Wedge Shoes

barbie shoesTeach that bubble-headed blonde bimbo, Barbie, a thing or two, by letting the air in her head heads hold you upright. Be like Ken and walk all over Barbie. These weird shoes are a staggering $264.99, but sadly are out of stock.

We will just have to work out our aggression toward Barbie by ripping some heads off on our own and stomping all over them.