You know those old ant farms people used to have on their desks? Yeah, me either. That’s because they were a bad idea. Because what if it breaks and they get loose? The Termitat Termite Exhibit For Your Desktop is the same thing only if it breaks, they eat your house up around you. This is homelessness on your desktop right here. Bad idea.
Tag: kickstarter
Poop Emoji Plunger
Poop. It’s what clogs up your toilet so you have to plunge and get nasty toilet water all over you. Poop is the enemy. Why do you think we get rid of it everyday? Why do you think we put it in flaming bags so other people step on it? Well, when it comes to clogging up the old docking yards with your Cleveland steamers, you have to fight poop with poop. Get the Poop Emoji Plunger.
And plunge that toilet with this smiling fecal friend. He’s poop. He’s a plunger. He gets the job done.
Don’t Cuddle The Krampus
Parents use the myth of Krampus to make their kids behave around Christmas time, but what if this creature was cute and cuddly? Warpo aims to make Krampus a creature that kids can love with their “Don’t Cuddle The Krampus” Kickstarter.
Krampus comes with 3 naughty kids, which you can help him to hunt down and put in his bag. That’s what he did back in the old days. He put kids in bags, beat ’em up real good and tossed them in a lake or something. You are basically teaching kids to become this mythic creature themselves. Sure. Let’s make all of our kids evil while doing Krampus’ job for him. He probably started this kickstarter himself just so he could be lazy and get some time off. That kind of thinking is why he’s my hero.
Weird Scented Crying Candles
These Scented Crying Candles look like they’re crying when lit inside of their decorative bases. Crybaby! Cry candle! Go ahead and cry for your mommy! Ya dingus!
These candles make me sad. Not really. I like having somebody to bully by candle light. Wipe those tears ya pansy! *Crying myself. Talking all raspy in cry-voice.* It’s what daddy used to say to me. So shut up. Crybaby. You don’t even know….
Syke. *Points and laughs at candle.* Quit yer crying Jon Cryer. You cry so much you’re like a Terminator from Cry-berdyne? Are you Cry-net, trying to take over the world with tears?
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The Not-A-Cat: It’s Not A Cat
The Not-A-Cat is not a cat. It just looks like a cat. Maybe you are allergic to cats or can’t afford to care for one. Well, now you can have Not-A-Cat. And just like a real cat, this thing will sleep all day and ignore you. The idea is that this lump of fur looks like a sleeping cat. You can stuff it into the corner of your couch and it will make it look like you have a real honest to glob cat, when in reality you have no one and nothing that cares for your company.
It’s not a cat. Just so we’re clear. It never claimed to be. It never will. It just wants to fill that lonely void in your life.
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