Tag: unique

Tovolo Zombies Popsicle Molds

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Tovolo Zombies Popsicle Molds
Make the walking dead the freezing dead with these Tovolo Zombies Popsicle Molds. Look, zombies want to eat you, so I say we eat them first. Stick a zombie in your mouth and suck! Heh. That’s my new insult. If someone says something I don’t like, I’m yelling, “Stick a zombie in your mouth and suck!” I’m hoping it really takes off and becomes something New Yorkers yell at each other every day.

Seriously though, these Popsicle molds are awesome. I’m gonna go make some delicious zombie treats now. Don’t let the door hit you… You shut up! You shut it right now! Stick a zombie in your mouth and suck!

Skull and Skeleton Toilet Bowl Brush Set

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Skull and Skeleton Toilet Bowl Brush Set
Oh man. Your bathroom is about to get badass peeps. This Skull and Skeleton Toilet Bowl Brush Set is going to look great in your Gothic themed bathroom. What? Don’t we all have Gothic themed bathrooms? Well, I just did mine up real nice with a bat toilet paper holder, stained glass window, some anti-vampire crucifixes and… Wait. You guys didn’t decorate your rooms? Guys, we were all supposed to do it. I’m the only one? Great. We pinky promised and everything. And I didn’t even want to pinky promise cuz it’s not manly, but I did anyway. This really sucks guys!

I just spent like 2 grand on all this! The gargoyle decorations alone cost me $200. Whatevs. I have a sweet Gothic human guano room and you don’t. I like to call it my steam room. As in Cleveland steamer. Oh! Zing! Didn’t see that coming did ya? Hmmmm. I really need to install some ventilation in here.

Misfortune Cookies Anti-Greeting Cards

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Misfortune Cookies Anti-Greeting Cards
What’s this? Someone sent me a greeting card! How thoughtful. Oh wait. It’s one of those Misfortune Cookies Anti-Greeting Cards. Not sure if I should be depressed or not. Send these to both your friends and your foes. On the front it says “This message will self-disturb in two seconds”. Then you write whatever you want inside. Pretty awesome and kinda twisted, which is just the way we like it around here. Don’t forget about the company’s actual Misfortune Cookies either. So dark and tasty. Give ’em as a gift and send them a card with it. Perfect.

The Ultimate Krampus Mug

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The Ultimate Krampus Mug
I can’t wait to get this Krampus Mug and chug my beer from it, slamming it down and asking for another. This mug is worthy of Krampus himself.

One Christmas Krampus drank himself sober.
He awoke to find Christmas was over.
His sack was empty and filled with no child
He had vague recollections of drinking so wild.
So he sauntered away into a cave
where he rested all day, then went to a rave.
Then he waited all year
And had several more beers
And repeated the whole thing over.

That’s why we don’t see Krampus today. He has a drinking problem.

Cool Skull Pen Holder and Desk Organizer

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Skull Pen Holder and Desk Organizer
Check out these good looking Skull Pen Holder and Desk Organizers. They’ll keep you company when you’re at your desk working, plus they help keep your desk tidy. Best of all they look pretty friggin cool. I know my desk needs more skulls on it. The only one decorating it right now is my own when I fall asleep trying to do my taxes. Taxes are a boring story that starts off all, “Once upon a time…” and ends like friggin Pearl Harbor with me crying about a surprise attack, even though it happens every year.