Ryan McArthur has created this USA Zombie Safe Zone Map that is marked with zombie safe zones that are abundant in the resources you’ll need while on the run. Thanks Ryan. I gotta stay alive during the apocalypse, so I can drive all the Mad Max cars and have a sweet-ass mohawk. This will also help me to find all of the other people who bought this map, so I can steal supplies from them. Awesome.
Tag: apocalypse
Zombie Friendship Keychains – Apocalypse Partners
Freddy Mercury said it best. Friends will be friends… Kind of obvious in retrospect, but there you have it. Friends are friends. Right till the end. Sometimes that end is a zombie apocalypse, with you shooting your friend in the head because your BFF is a dirty rotten zombie. That’s the way it goes. Doesn’t mean you aren’t friends. Just means you don’t want them eating your brain. Anyway, this Zombie Friendship Keychains set signifies that you and your BFF are zombie apocalypse partners and that you vow to do whatever it takes when the zombies roam the streets. Even if that thing is splitting up and running when you see the undead.
Even though it means that you will never find each other again, while you live a harsh life of survival, doing whatever you have to to get by, so that 5 years later your shaggy bearded self checks the zombie traps you set (the ones where they step on a trigger and a blade swings down, chopping their heads off) only to find a headless zombie body and the other half of your keychain in its pocket.
*Tears* So sad. Still friends. But so sad.
Not So Happy Meal – Apocalyptic McDonald’s Art
Get ready for a depressing meal people. This Apocalyptic McDonald’s Art is from Jake and Dinos Chapman. ba da bop ba ba I’m lovin’ it. Is Ronald the savior or the enemy here? I have no idea. But I do know that this is what happens to the world when you eat too many Big Macs. Ronald is stomping those zombies WWE style. Is that right? Is it WWF? I have no idea, cuz I don’t watch half naked and sweaty men rolling around on a “wrestling” mat together. Not that there’s anything wrong with that.
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Be Prepared: Zombie Survival Kit
This is a Zombie Survival Kit that you can buy to be prepared for the eventual zombie apocalypse. I have no idea what’s going on in that image above. I think it’s the story of a cowgirl experiencing an undead outbreak firsthand. She was probably minding her own business, riding a mechanical bull, in some dark warehouse, or maybe giving a lap dance while some dude admires her tramp stamp, I have no idea, when the zombies burst in. So she got her knife out and got to work because she had this survival kit. Looking fabulous while chopping heads and making the undead dead again. Yippe Ky yay MFer! And that is exactly how you keep your sleezy nightclub free of undead freaks. She’s my new hero. Or is it heroine? She is my new heroine. I plan to take her internally once I find a vein and sleep with my eyes open and a smile on my face as I watch her exploits in my mind.
This kit includes a survival bandanna, survival saw, machete, germicide tablets, survival can, emergency blanket, survival book, first aid book, compass kit, gas mask, and a heavy wooden crate with a locking clasp.
Zombie Apocalypse Necklace
When in the middle of the zombie apocalypse, you gotta look cool. Wear something freaky and intimidating so zombies know you mean business. Like a necklace full of babies. That’s what the Zombie Apocalypse Necklace is. You’re also gonna need a baby on board sign. Cuz you know, you got babies on board.
Hey babies. Get on my neck! That’s right zombies, if I have a neck full of babies, I won’t have a problem chopping your head off. Yeah, that’s what I thought! Keep shuffling, you brain craving freak.
Can be worn as a necklace or as a creepy baby beard.