Decorating your Halloween tree isn’t for the birds. Or maybe it is. These Bird Skull Halloween Ornaments are going to look amazing on your All Hallows Eve tree. Here’s a joke for ya. What do you call a bird in a pastry? A magpie. Get it? Well, it’s not so much a joke as it the ramblings of an insane person, but still. What do you call a bunch of birds lining up for poured drinks? A crow bar.
Tag: bizarre
Freaky Rat Worm Sighting
What the shizz! Check out this nightmarish mystery creature that resembles some kind of cross between a rat and worm. What is this nightmare? It ain’t nothing like your common rat. Some British woman noticed this freaky rat slithering around on her back porch, just chilling. I would have stomped on it but would be too afraid that a million tiny spiders would burst out and all attack me. I hope this woman had the good sense to move away from that house after seeing this thing.
The rat clock didn’t even tell me it was time for this weird nightmare. I’m not seeing the rat part myself, but maybe rats are different in Britain. I don’t know what this thing is, but I don’t want any part of it. Nope. Not the rat part and not the worm part. Does it have a knife? That looks like a blade. It looks like it’s ready to cut a b***h! Looks like a butter knife. I wonder if it waved that blade around to scare this British woman. This freaky rat is tough. From the streets for sure. The hood. I wonder what its gang name is. Probably the Knife Worms.
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Skeleton F You Middle Finger Fork
Check out this Skeleton F You Middle Finger Fork. At last, I can give the middle finger to broccoli, peas, and cauliflower. F you vegetables. In fact, F you to anything that’s not a cupcake pretty much. That’s why you’re morbidly obese. What? Ain’t nothing morbid about it. I’m just fat as f**k! A fat F**k making a donut run. You want anything while I’m out? Ow, my heart hurts! Do me a favor and punch me right there? OFF! That’s the spot. Kicked back into gear. All good now.
Leather Grimoire Crow Spellbook
Here’s something to crow about. This Leather Grimoire Crow Spellbook could also be a notebook. It just depends on what you put inside. You can put spells in it, notes, whatever you want. It’s pretty slick looking. In fact, beautiful. What? Don’t call that bird an old crow. It’s not like it’s collecting crow-cial Security. Geesh.
Freddy Kreuger Taxidermy Mouse
Look who it is. The rodent of my nightmares. The Freddy Kreuger taxidermy Mouse. He will haunt your dreams and search for cheese. If he doesn’t find any cheese, he’ll just nibble on your soul. Sadly, mousetraps don’t work in the dream world. So good luck with this guy. I just won’t sleep.