
Check out this Skeleton F You Middle Finger Fork. At last, I can give the middle finger to broccoli, peas, and cauliflower. F you vegetables. In fact, F you to anything that’s not a cupcake pretty much. That’s why you’re morbidly obese. What? Ain’t nothing morbid about it. I’m just fat as f**k! A fat F**k making a donut run. You want anything while I’m out? Ow, my heart hurts! Do me a favor and punch me right there? OFF! That’s the spot. Kicked back into gear. All good now.
Tag: utensil
Facehugger Appetizer 3-Piece Set

Is there anything more appetizing than a slimy Facehugger attaching itself to your face and giving you a big hug? Of course not. That’s why you need this Facehugger Appetizer 3-Piece Set. Your hors d’oeuvres will taste so much better when dangling under an alien killer.
Okay, how many of you said “whores de-vores” in your head and giggled? Me too. Now let’s serve up some tiny weenies and cheese cubes cuz food is the best facehugger ever.
Skull Shaped Sugar Spoon

This skull shaped sugar spoon lets you pile heaping mounds of sugar aka white death onto your spoon so that it looks like the poison it is.
The hell? Did I just say that? Yeah, I’ve been putting the moves on this healthy chick, so I have to practice and pretend I’m not a fat slob. It’s gonna work out great right up until I invite her over for Mac and Cheese with a bacon appetizer.
Totally getting this spoon though. Mounds of skull sugar are the best. It’s like having a sugary grim reaper bringing you one step closer to his embrace, a spoonful at a time.
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Moby Whisk: Whisk It With A Whale Tail

When some batter comes along, you must whisk it. Now whisk it. Whisk it good. With a whale tail. Whale hello! This mixing whisk has a whale tail. Thankfully, not the kind you see at Walmart. For those you would need a much bigger bowl. It is taking the kitchens of animal lovers everywhere by storm and goes perfectly with the Loch Ness Monster Ladle.
Have a whale of a good time while whipping up some food for the family. It’s really over-whale-ming.
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