Tag: clothes

Watch Your Back: Gold Googly Eye Bomber Jacket

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

google eye jacket
Great Googly Moogly! Watch your back when wearing this Gold Googly Eye Bomber Jacket. I guess it already is being watched. It’s all business in front, making you look all gold and sexy. But in back, the eyes are following you. And creeping out everyone behind you. If you have any stalkers, this should be enough to get rid of them.

Don’t worry about strangers eyeing you up. Your jacket is already doing that. It’s like a field of Googly eyed stars all free-floating in space. All looking down at your badonkadonk.
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Pet Hoodies Make Your Pet Look Gangster

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

pet hoodies
Make your pet look like the badass he/she is with Pet Hoodies. Besides, small pets can have a hard time keeping warm in the winter months. Make them look warm and tough, so that every time they stare at you wanting food, you feel like you are about to get mugged. It’s cool. I don’t want any trouble. Wet food coming right up.

And make sure you give your pet a cool gangster name to go with their new hoodie. Better yet, give them a rapper name. Like Dr. Spay or 2pac Shapurr.

The World’s Coldest Hoodie

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worlds smallest hoodie
At last a hoodie for never nudes! This hoodie shows off your not-so-killer abs, but why are you always so cold? This awesome hoodie is all black with neon stitching and even has a zipper that- Well, let’s face it, that zipper doesn’t even matter. It does have a full hood though, so while your nipples are shriveled up so tight they squirt man-milk, your head will be warm and toasty.

Looks like it goes well with high heels, tube socks and a Village People construction guy mustache. YMCA biatches!

Star Trek Diapers: Poop, The Final Frontier

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star trek baby diaper
Poop: The Final Frontier. I should get a pair of these, since every woman in my life calls me a man-baby and I do like to cosplay as Captain Picard. Doody-free preferably. I like my number one on the bridge. In the chair next to me. With a beard. Not in a saggy diaper that leaks and gives me a rash. Make it so!

I like my number two shot out of the photon torpedo tubes so it can freeze and twirl and spin before breaking into a million pieces against that Ferengi ship off the port bow.

“Any Klingons Number One?”

“Not a one sir. It all just broke on impact. Not a single bit clinged-on.” *Sly grin*

*Picard grins back. Sits back in the chair.*

Data looks perplexed.

Worf Sighs.

“Our work here is done. Engage!”

End episode!
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