Check out Little Poopers. Someone’s raising a stink. Who took a dump in here? And, what the deuce? Why is it….cute? A cute turd? Is that a curd? Who left it? Unicorns? Fairies? Hello Kitty riding on a unicorn with a fairy after eating too much roughage? No matter how adorable these poops may seem, they’re still stinkers. Trust me, they will draw flies. Big or small, cute or ugly, all poop stinks. But they think they’re the sh*t!. Does it make it better or worse that these turds can stare back at you? Talk about awkward eye contact. No matter where you leave one of these little poopers figurines, it will be sure to start a conversation! Or raise a stink. Much like ZooPoo.
Tag: gross
Ball of Worms – With Realistic Slime
Goodness gracious, great ball of worms. Throw these things back and forth and have a ball. Or a worm. It’s not a ball of wax, it’s not a ball of fun. It’s a great big ball of ewww! A ball of ick and ack, a ball that is whacked. Writhing worms, now with realistic slime coating. You could make one yourself by collecting worms from the dirt and compacting them into a nasty slimy ball, but it will always SPLAT on impact and that’s never pretty. Especially if you get hit upside the head. That’s how you get an ear worm.
These balls have all the yuck and none of the guts. They worm my heart. *You got balls kid!* Thanks, they’re full of worms. *Uh, okay, now get the hell away from me boy* Actually it takes real balls to display these things in your home. For real. And for some reason I never ever want to eat pasta again. I wonder why. I prefer these caterpillar babies.
Disturbies Horror Dolls
What the shizz?!!? Uh… You ugly. These Disturbies Horror Dolls are well named. Everything about ’em is disturbing. Look at that smile? What the hell he just eat that’s dripping all out his nasty mouth? Dude is like a fetus with a 50-year-old’s hair too. How? Why? Oh, I see. The seller says it is “born from flesh, blood, pus, spunk, and everything wrong. For you to love and cherish. Forever.”
Yeah, that clears it all up. That is one creepy doll.
Human Teeth Ring
Hmmmm. Do I really want my finger to be bitten for all time? I’ll have to think about that. This Human Teeth Ring is cool and all, but if I wanted that, I would just stick my finger in someone’s mouth. If I wear this, am I teething? Do I have to brush these when I brush my own? I have no idea. But I kinda still wanna wear it.
Mutant Martini Glass
This Mutant Martini Glass will leave you shaken AND stirred. Would you like a drink? Uhhhhh. Well, I- I just remembered I don’t drink alcohol. Those better be olives and not eyes in that drink. Martini or Mutant-tini? This seller has many other horrifying drinking vessels as well. They are terrifying enough to make you swear off alcohol. It’s true. I do nothing but swear at my drinks now. F**k off Martini!