Tag: jewelry

Bat Collar Necklace

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Bat Collar Necklace

Holy bat apparel Batman! This Bat Collar Necklace is stylishly batty. Creepy and cordial. Now that is fashionably Gothic. This is going to make some lucky gal look extra sexy. Bonus: It protects your neck from vampires at the same time. Is it a little batty? Sure, but in a great way. Not gonna lie, I’m a little turned on. Ladies, if you are rocking this Bat Collar Necklace, I’m drooling.

Between this and the Bloody Pearl Necklace Choker, how do you even decide? You gals have options. Never fear, I’ll keep finding amazing jewelry for you my dears. All I ask is that you wear it and let me take in your amazing beauty.

Blood Vial Pendant Kit

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Blood Vial Pendant Kit

So this Blood Vial Pendant Kit is bloody cool and bloody stylish. As the seller says, Blood has been used for magical purposes for hundreds of years and has been know to represent life force in its most basic nature. Apparently I’ve been doing it all wrong. I’ve been trying to use my band aids for magical purposes. It just ain’t working. You get one complete kit to craft one blood vial pendant necklace. You can use your own blood, or a lover, or some Kool-Aid if you want. That’s also what the seller said. But I added the Kool-Aid part. I’m not judging.

Personally, I’d combine this with the Bloody Pearl Necklace Choker.

Bloody Pearl Necklace Choker

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Bloody Pearl Necklace Choker

For the refined lady with a touch of darkness. I present to you the Bloody Pearl Necklace Choker. You are refined and intelligent, regal. But you long for the vampire’s breath gently caressing your neck, suddenly growing hot as he bares his teeth and goes in for the bite. At first, the pain is unbearable, but quickly becomes ecstatic. Your essence rushes out, pumped by his lustful need- Oh shizz, I was saying that out loud as I typed and now everyone at the library is looking at me. Hey, it’s where I write sometimes. That librarian must have dry lips. She keeps licking them as she watches me. Get some ChapStick freak!

Anyway, if you crave the excitement of vampiric exsanguination, but lack either a nearby vampire or good looks, this Bloody Pearl Necklace Choker is the next best thing. Look at that sophisticated and stylish splatter. Sexy! Now that’s a necklace!

Huge Spider Earring – Thank God For Wax

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Huge Spider Earring - Thank God For Wax

Just when I was getting over my fear of giant spiders crawling into my ear. This Huge Spider Earring has me whimpering at night once more as I fill my ear holes with cotton and put on headphones. There I go sleeping through the alarm again. But it beats some 8-legged alien mofo laying eggs in my ear canal. If I see you wearing this, don’t be surprised if I slap it clear off your face. Ain’t no room in my life for any spider this damn big.

First it crawls in your ear. Then you become the spider and won’t even need these spider goggles.

Victorian Brooch With Skull

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Victorian Brooch With Skull
Well, what do we have here? A Victorian Brooch With Skull. But who’s that lady? My my my, you wear it well. You make me want to bone… (up on my fashion). Is she a sexy fortune teller looking for her own fortune? One that comes in the form of a man who writes a certain blog? A stylish gypsy delivering important news that will save the world? A mystic who wants mystick? I’m sorry, that was inappropriate. But I think I’m in love. I have to get a hold of myself. No, not in that way. Get your head out of the gutter. *Slaps myself* That’s better. Let’s talk about that Victorian Brooch. This one-of-a-kind brooch is a statement piece that will get you noticed for sure. The artist calls it morning jewelry and I’m all like, you can’t wear it afternoon? Oh… Mourning. My condolences my lady. I couldn’t help but notice your exceptionally dramatic brooch with the cool skull in it. Now if I might brooch the subject of your place or mine… Can I interest you in this Gothic Raven Brooch? Well, thank you all the same, but I’m perfectly capable of slapping myself thank you very much.