Tag: jewelry

Tongue Earrings – You Have Good Taste…Buds

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Tongue Earrings - You Have Good Taste...Buds
Well, these Tongue Earrings will certainly lick the competition. I think this is the first time I’ve ever seen pierced ears holding something else that is pierced. I was always told that a tongue in the ear was highly inappropriate, but I guess not. It’s not exactly my taste, but… I wonder if they leave your neck all moist as they swing and sway. They will give your ears real tongue-lashing.

Anyway, yes, these tongue earrings exist, and that is just the world we are living in. What else can I even say? It leaves me flabbergasted, Positively tongue-tied. If you like this, you’ll love the Freddy Krueger Tongue Phone.

Demented Doll Face Horror Brooch

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Demented Doll Face Horror Brooch
Good God! What is that Demented Doll Face pinned to your shirt? Did it burst out of your chest? This soulless doll is for attention-seekers. She is eating her own ever-lovin eyeball! What does that taste like? Chicken. It’s always chicken! Her creepy, all-seeing, little eye stares from between her lips, staring and saying wassup. Where did she come from? Heaven? Hell? The underworld? The upside-down? The answer is obvious. Hell. Gotta be hell. Is it me or does the eyeball follow you? Glad you had a good lunch, lady. She is the epitome of a gothic, creepy, cyclops head.

I’m calling her Iris for obvious reasons. When you wear this little gem, all eyes are going to be on you. Not just the one in her mouth. Plus, are those eyelids sealed shut? Maybe she shiftf her eyes between her eye-sockets and her mouth. It’s more nightmare-inducing the more you think about it. I bet the only way to kill this demented doll face is to put it in front of a mirror. Or make it face off against the Eyeball Door Knob.

Dentures Brooch – Haute Cou-Tooth

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Dentures Brooch - Haute Cou-Tooth
3…tooth…1… Looking for a fancy new Dentures Brooch? Here you go. It goes with anything. Wear it with a blazer, a sweater, wear it on your pants and if anyone asks you have an elder girlfriend who left them behind. Or that a hooker left them behind. AKA an in-dentured servant. I have no idea and that’s the tooth. I just work here and I spend most of the day napping. This dentures brooch is a dangly, toothy, do not brooch this subject brooch. It pairs well with the human teeth ring. Which sounds like some elderly gang who goes around stealing teeth, but it’s not.

Grim Reaper Scythe Choker Necklace – Why So Grim?

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Grim Reaper Scythe Choker Necklace
This Grim Reaper Scythe Choker Necklace won’t give you the power over who lives and who dies, but it will get you noticed. (Hopefully not by the reaper himself. You don’t want to be noticed by him.) And also make people keep their distance from you. It’s the Grim Reaper‘s weapon of choice right there on your chest as a cool and creepy accessory. Why is he so grim anyway? Seems like a sweet job. Kind of a breeze. Some people are just grumpy and never happy.

You have a list of names and you use that list to shuffle folks off of this mortal coil while holding your Grim Reaper Scythe. Some people are never happy. I guess there’s no room for promotion though. Hey, I’m in the bidness and I just got promoted. And I’m aiming to take his job. I’ll be the happy reap- Wait! Who shouted “bum reaper”? No respect! Now you are on my list. You are the first one. Congratulations. I hope you like a scythe where the sun don’t shine. Anyone else? Huh? Does anyone else have anything to say? Yeah, that’s what I thought. Man I really hate this job already.

 

Enamel Cobweb Collar Points – Creepy Couture

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Enamel Cobweb Collar Points
Dust off your collars you sexy goth girls and make room for these Enamel Cobweb Collar Points. So sexy. So spider webby. So on point. You get the point I’m making here? Oh what a tangled web you weave. On your collar. This is the sharpest looking thing to ever exit a spider’s butt. Unless it ate glass or something. You never know. Spiders are a weird lot. Anyway… That is some creepy-couture right there. A great axe-cessory. A touch of Goth if you will. (Usually a touch of goth for me ends with me in a sleeper hold and told to mind my hands.) Perfect for you mavins of macabre and frightening fashionistas. These points are on point. In a very pointed way. The Pointer sisters would approve. I’ve pointed the way to fashion. Now all you have to do is collar up with these Cobweb Collar Points baby. And I just pointed you right to ’em like a pointer dog. He heh. These jokes never got old. (Dusts some mold off of that last joke while you aren’t looking.) These things make your collar look like an old dusty house. In a good way.

Get you some style Goth girls.