Is it too early for Krampus? Yeah, it might be the wrong time of the year, but I don’t care. I’d wear this Krampus Tiki Tribal BOLO Neck Tie anytime. That’s a terrifying tiki face right there. Nice tongue dude. I’m gonna wear this next Christmas. That reminds me, the doctor always makes my tongue sad though. You know why? He uses a tongue depressor. Hahhahahahaha.
Tag: krampus
Funko Krampus Pops – Not In Your Grocer’s Freezer
Tis the time of year for Krampus, which means that it’s also the time of year for Funko Krampus Pops. Sounds like frozen treats endorsed by the K man, but no, Krampus Pops are cool Pop Vinyl figures of the K man. I call him that cuz of his Ketamine addiction in the 90s. It’s cool, I can talk about it. We tight like that. Anyway, these cool figures come on several varieties and all have the Christmas spirit as only the Kramp-Man can deliver.
This Krampus Night Light Makes it a Scary Christmas
Krampus never sleeps. And neither does this scary Krampus Night Light. Krampus will be with you throughout the night. But is he protecting you or waiting for you to fall asleep so he can reward you for being naughty this year? I have no idea, but I want to put an everlasting gobstopper in that mouth, because the tongue really freaks me out.
The Ultimate Krampus Mug
I can’t wait to get this Krampus Mug and chug my beer from it, slamming it down and asking for another. This mug is worthy of Krampus himself.
One Christmas Krampus drank himself sober.
He awoke to find Christmas was over.
His sack was empty and filled with no child
He had vague recollections of drinking so wild.
So he sauntered away into a cave
where he rested all day, then went to a rave.
Then he waited all year
And had several more beers
And repeated the whole thing over.
That’s why we don’t see Krampus today. He has a drinking problem.
Ugly Krampus Christmas Sweater Sweatshirt
Buck holiday traditions by wearing whatever the hell you want. Who wants a bright and colorful sweater when you can invite Krampus to the party and kick things up a notch? This Ugly Krampus Christmas Sweater features Krampus and his legendary tongue, some bells, pentagrams, trees, bones and more. It’s gonna be a Krampus Christmas up in this biatch! Better lock up your kids, cuz I have a sack that needs filling. God, that sounds so wrong. I’m just saying that the Kramp-man stuffs kids in sacks. Geesh.