This Life Size Poseable Skeleton has locking joints so you can pose them anyway you want. You know what that means, right neighbors? That’s right, my skeletons are lewd and crude and full of attitude. And not to be misconstrued. You live next to me and you’re screwed. And now I ran out of rhyming words. But basically I’m saying that I’m posing ’em all nasty like. Deal with it. You have blinds.
Author: Artemis Winterford
Horror Happy Meals
These Horror Happy Meals don’t seem all that kid friendly to me. Which I like. They were made by graphic designer Newt Cloninger-Clements. La-de-da, I have three names. Sorry. Did I actually type that? I’ll stand by it. Even though I think three names are excessive. Anyway, this guy made a ton of mock-ups of some more adult, horror-themed Happy Meals. There’s Stranger Things, Ash Vs. The Evil Dead, American Horror Story, and many more. Check out his Twitter and Pinterest for more.
They come with some sweet toys, I’ll give him that. Now I have to wait for him to open a fast food place so I can collect them all.
Read more “Horror Happy Meals”
Full Body Skeleton Halloween Costume
Man, girls like this make me so nervous. I never know what to say. Nice Full Body Skeleton Halloween Costume. Seems like I can’t say anything without coming off like a jerk. I can’t tell her that I want to strip the bones off of her. Just sounds wrong. No matter how true it may be. Hey baby, you have some tight fitting bones! No, that won’t work. She does have a nice set of ribs on her though. This is the first time something has ever been ribbed for my pleasure. Just FYI. You see why I’m such a hit with the ladies? You should all be happy I spend my time writing this blog, rather than being slapped by you all day long. Bringing you the hits like this poison ivy costume.
Ornate Coffin Mirror
Step up to the Ornate Coffin Mirror and have a gander. See who is resting in peace. Spoiler alert. It’s you! It’s always gonna be you. And since you are going to die one day, this mirror tells the future. Unless you choose to be cremated. Then you’ll just show up as a blurry ashy shape in the mirror. What a thrill, to wake up and look into a coffin every morning and see your own fugly face of mortality staring back at you. Makes you feel alive. Also depressed.
Tentacle Lantern Wall Plaque with LED Light
This Tentacle Lantern Wall Plaque with LED Light is awesome. It’s like Cthulhu just punched a tentacle through your wall to give you a little light. Thanks a lot Cthulhu, but unless you plan on staying there and holding that light for the rest of your life, I’m gonna need that wall fixed. Damn. Stop trying to be so overly helpful. It causes problems. Great. Now I hurt his feelings. It’s gonna be okay big guy. Stop crying. My walls are getting all wet.