This Tentacle Lantern Wall Plaque with LED Light is awesome. It’s like Cthulhu just punched a tentacle through your wall to give you a little light. Thanks a lot Cthulhu, but unless you plan on staying there and holding that light for the rest of your life, I’m gonna need that wall fixed. Damn. Stop trying to be so overly helpful. It causes problems. Great. Now I hurt his feelings. It’s gonna be okay big guy. Stop crying. My walls are getting all wet.
Tag: wall plaque
Ghost in the Mirror Wall Plaque
Mirror, mirror on the wall- What the? Either I just turned into a beautiful pale woman or there’s a ghost in my mirror. Hey baby. I would say, “My place or yours”, but clearly you already chose my place. This Ghost in the Mirror Wall Plaque will liven up your home. Hopefully she’s always stuck and doesn’t fully emerge one day. I’m gonna get one and hang my keys from her fingers, until she goes back into mirror-world one day and steals them. But that’s cool. She can get away with anything cuz I’m kinda attracted to her. Not that I have a ghost of a chance with her.
Medusa Gorgon Wall Plaque
This Medusa Gorgon Wall Plaque is gonna look great on your wall. Most people think that an evil woman with snakes in her hair, who will turn you to stone with one look, is just a myth. Those people never met my ex wife. Statues? Those people have met my ex wife. And now they get to hang out in museums and stuff, where I make fun of their little pee-pees and try to chip a piece off.
Still, those are some lovely locks. You go girl! It’s like a friggin’ Pantene commercial up in this mother. Give me the hair flip. Oh girl, you got it going on. Flip that luxurious and biting mane. Run your hand through it- Oh there goes your hand. It’s just a bloody stump now. It’s cool, you have another. I want to see some intensity in those eye sockets!
Silver Dinosaur Head
Man, rich people have all the fun and luxury stuff. By rich people, I mean people with $100 to spend. Like this insane silver dinosaur head. It will probably be on the wall in some house that has a baby. People will be all like, “Were you born with a silver spoon?”
And he’ll be all like, “No, but we had a silver dinosaur head! So yes I am better than you. Now, where were we? Oh yes. I said PASS THE GREY POUPON you peasant! Chop chop!”