Hangman Tie: Tighten The Noose

Hangman Tie Tighten The Noose
Do you have to wear a noose to work everyday? I feel for you man. Me too. It’s a real noose-ance. Nothing to get all knotted up about. Check out the Hangman Tie. Now that’s a noose.

We all know that having to wear ties is nothing but “the man” keeping us down. By “the man” I mean the hangman obviously. Working for the man ain’t nothing but a slow climb up the gallows with only a quick drop to look forward to. Damn, I said something profound. Now I have to go look up “profound”. Also, sorry about the gallows humor. Damn, I said something “profound” again. BRB while I go look it up.

Update: Sorry it took so long. I forgot how to spell it, then got distracted by the TV. Then again by the computer. I still don’t know what it means, but here’s my definition: I’m friggin awesome!

Dinosaur and Jesus Christmas Ornament

Dinosaur and Jesus Christmas Ornament
It’s never too early to start planning your Christmas tree. This year I’m gonna let a dinosaur and Jesus duke it out with this Dinosaur and Jesus Christmas Ornament set. It’s the fight of the millennium. The ultimate smackdown. It’s dino vs deity! The Jurassic vs the Jesus! Who am I kidding? It lasts about 3 seconds and ends with Jesus hurling a meteor. He learned that trick from his dad. That’s dinosaur pest control in action.

Sugar Skull Cameo Necklace

Sugar Skull Cameo Necklace
This Sugar Skull Cameo Necklace wants to make a cameo appearance around your neck. It has flowers in it’s eyes and looks all badass. Give me some sugar baby. And I’ll give you a skull. What? That’s not how it works? Great, I’ve been doing the whole sugar skull thing wrong. I feel like an idiot. Whatevs. It’s a cool necklace.

Skull Hair Clips

Skull Hair Clips
Damn, somebody’s got little skull caves in their hair and those caves have residents! Looks like they just popped out and took a bite of hair. These Skull Hair Clips will make you look cool too. I think they call that style “victory rolls”. Yeah, whenever you trap some skulls in your hair and keep ’em as pets, that’s a victory. Before this I thought victory rolls was that moment when the pillsbury comes out of the oven and you shout, “victory rolls!”

I know a lady who has squirrel bones and a bird skull in her hair, but she lives under an underpass.

Vinyl Monster Decals For Your Car

Vinyl Monster Decals For Your Car
3QuartermoonCreative sells all kinds of cool Vinyl Monster Decals For Your Car. I’m gonna get some of these. Monsters will keep people from tailgating me all day. Get off my butt man! You don’t wanna wake the monster! That’s a warning sticker pal! You hit me and pop my trunk, this is the monster you’re gonna see. Well, that and like 10 potato chip bags and a pair of jumper cables.
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