Tag: bat

Vintage Bat Sunglasses

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Vintage Bat Sunglasses
Go batty with these cool Vintage Bat Sunglasses. If you don’t mind people knowing that you’re a vampire, these are perfect. I should check with my bat-tometrist and see if these will work with my own limited bat-like vision. *Tosses my old glasses aside.* Goodbye coke-bottle lenses! You think that’s bad, my eye doctor wanted me to upgrade to Pepsi. We compromised at Mountain dew. *Tries on bat sunglasses.* Yeah, that didn’t help.

Oh, right… Sunglasses. If I could read the writing, I would have known that. That’s me, blind as a bat. At least now I can have a bat on my face.

Bat Compact Mirror

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Bat Compact Mirror
This Bat Compact Mirror will make putting on your makeup even more fun. It’s just you and your bat-mirror, fixin’ up that face! Well I- No, let me get a word in- I didn’t mean your face isn’t pretty already. I’m just saying that bats are great makeup wingmen, because they actually have wings. This compact is all kinds of Victorian, steampunk, bat punk, gothic, not to mention I just ran out of adjectives.

If I were a woman, I’d be putting on makeup all day long just so I could use this cool mirror and brag how cool it is, and be snooty, and talk about how beautiful I am. Yeah, I would be a B**ch… A b**ch with an awesome accessory, that you don’t have! Am I right ladies?
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Bat Skull Cabinet Hardware

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Bat Skull Cabinet Hardware
Quick Robin! To the Bat-Cabinet! Holy smokes Batman! Which one is the Bat Cabinet again? They are the ones with the Bat Skull Cabinet Hardware you idiot. And by the way, can we update that outfit? Kinda makes me look bad you know. I am a much older man and those tights… Not good.

This Bat Skull Cabinet hardware is awesome. Does this mean that your cabinet is a belfry now? It’s got bats. Anything that has bats is a belfry. I kind of like the idea of grabbing a bat skull every time I go into a cabinet for some cereal or peanut butter. Don’t worry little bats, I won’t crush your head with my grip. Or poke you in the eye-sockets. I will be gentle,but firm.
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Posable Albino Bat Doll / Hair Clip

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Posable Albino Bat Doll Hair Clip
This Posable Albino Bat Doll / Hair Clip wants to spend its days in your hair and flap it’s wings to keep you nice and air-conditioned. You can also attach it to your clothes, backpack, purse, someone’s back so they scream and run around… It’s albino, it’s poseable, it’s cute, it’s batty.He makes a good little friend to just display in your home.

I’m gonna call mine Pinkeye, cuz he obviously has it. He’s gonna infect me, then we’ll both have it and I will slowly turn into an albino. We will hang together from a cave roof and hunt insects. I’m not gonna poopon the cave floor though, that’s just disgusting. Goodbye human world. Something is happening. Something wonderful… *Screeeeeech*

Cool Bat Collar Pin

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Cool Bat Collar Pin
Bats are really the ultimate accessory. How else else are ya gonna keep your collar closed? Bat wings are perfect for the job. This Bat Collar Pin is fashionable and squeak. I mean chic. Squeak chic.

Bats, bats, they’re right under your nose. Bats, bats, they’re all over our clothes. Put ’em on your belt, put ’em on your collar. Don’t have a bat? Give a bat a holler. Send a bat away and he’ll bring bat a dollar.

This bat-related article brought to you by too much alcohol and not enough common sense.