Mice and bats are mortal enemies. Everyone knows this. Their crazy-ass feud is illustrated nicely in this Taxidermy Mice and Bats Torture Chamber Display. Check out that brown mouse, holding a bloody sword pointed at the white mouse who is trapped in a hanging cage! He’s all like, “You better talk and talk soon, cuz I came to eat cheese and kick ass. And I’m all outta cheese.”
Pretty crazy. When will this war end?
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Damn, that bat is hardcore cute! Put this Cute Velvet Bat in your belfry, car window, pocket, whatever. Who doesn’t love bats? The insects that they eat. That’s who. Otherwise everybody loves a bat. What? You don’t love bats? What’s wrong with you? What, are you batty? This guy looks like a little bat Dracula. Bat-cula.
This Mounted Vampire Bat Head looks good on my wall. I just like that-
*Ding-Dong*
Oh, my pen-pal has arrived from Transylvania. We’ve been writing each other for like 4 years. It will be so good to meet him.
*Opens door*
Good even-ing! I am Count Tofour. You must be the fat blogger I write to for amusement.
Sure am. Here, sit down. Dinner is almost ready. Nice to meet you Count.
Watt is this Bat head zat is mounted on wall? This I do not like. It offends me. Tell me, you are truly tested for clean blood as you said in your letter?
Oh yeah. Clean bill of- AHHHH Get off me.
How dare you decorate with the head of my brethren! I come long way for snack. You are, how you say? Big fat buffet! *Sinks teeth in.*
This Bat Choker Necklace looks awesome. Let me clarify, cuz words can be confusing. This jewelry is called a bat choker, but is not about choking bats. Choking bats is bad and I’m pretty sure it is illegal in at least 11 states. It is in fact a bat that also happens to be a choker… No, I don’t mean that this bat flies around choking victims. That would just be silly and anyway, there hasn’t been a bat-choking case since 1881. And I’m pretty sure that guy choked on a hot dog and just blamed a bat. No, it’s- I give up. I just wanted to share this cool necklace. Sheesh.
You know what time it is. Time for bats! Put this Bat Coffin Clock in your belfry and go batty. It’s a coffin. It’s a clock. Bats are everywhere! What more could you want? Halloween is fast approaching and you’re going to want to decorate. This is the perfect October clock right here. It’s Bat-tastic.