Krampus never sleeps. And neither does this scary Krampus Night Light. Krampus will be with you throughout the night. But is he protecting you or waiting for you to fall asleep so he can reward you for being naughty this year? I have no idea, but I want to put an everlasting gobstopper in that mouth, because the tongue really freaks me out.
Tag: christmas
The Ultimate Krampus Mug
I can’t wait to get this Krampus Mug and chug my beer from it, slamming it down and asking for another. This mug is worthy of Krampus himself.
One Christmas Krampus drank himself sober.
He awoke to find Christmas was over.
His sack was empty and filled with no child
He had vague recollections of drinking so wild.
So he sauntered away into a cave
where he rested all day, then went to a rave.
Then he waited all year
And had several more beers
And repeated the whole thing over.
That’s why we don’t see Krampus today. He has a drinking problem.
Miss Pennywise Tree Topper Looks Like Ronald McDonald
Da da da da da I’m not lovin’ it! This Miss Pennywise Tree Topper is pretty creepy, but mostly cuz it looks like Ronald McDonald. It gave me a grimace. Ha. See what I did there? Was that a cheesy joke? Well then butter my bun and call me Mayor McCheese. Put this tree topper on and Santa will not be coming this year, but you know who’s gonna come down your chimney on Christmas Eve? The Hamburglar. And he’s gonna burgle your presents, your house and maybe your butt. That last part is purely speculation based on his previous behavior.
Krampus Angel Tree Toppers
Turn your Christmas tree into a Krampus tree this year. And every year! These Krampus Angel Tree Toppers from SphyrnaEffects are the demented decorations you want. He just wants to sit on top of your tree looking all menacing and mean. Man, I hope he’s not too mean though. You don’t think he’s gonna poop all over my gifts do you? I mean, I guess I don’t mind little bird like poops, but I don’t trust him. I think he’s got a full yule log in him and the urge to build a log cabin.
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Krampus With Child Statue
The Krampus With Child Statue makes for a classically horrifying bit of Christmas decoration. Damn Krampus. Control yourself and get your tongue back in your mouth. You gonna throw that sacked up kid in a lake or drown him with your saliva? Poor kid. Look at him. He’s all dressed up with his good shirt, has a tie on, little guy wanted to look good for Christmas. Then this happens. You know the bottom of that sack is full of poop too, the only question is how much.