Barbie is a role model for anorexic girls everywhere. The doll has probably done young girls more harm than a million Miley Cyrus’ twerking ever could. That’s why it would be awesome if the Borg assimilated her. Resistance is futile b*tch. Go ahead and run into your Malibu beach house. They will find you and you will become part of the collective.
Read more “Creepy Cyborg Barbie With Arm Whipping Action”
Tag: ebay
General Custer’s Head In A Box
General George Armstrong Custer. Or as I like to call him, Ol’ Indian Pin-Cushion Custer. Or Ol’ Porcupine Custer. Back in those days when you saw a white man, you either called him a honky mofo and filled him full of arrows or you lost your land and ended up the last of your line to never be in the casino business. Well, here’s his head. In a box.
Read more “General Custer’s Head In A Box”
My Cat Wants This: Crazy Insane Giant Rubber Band Ball
I just caught my cat pawing at my keyboard and shopping on Ebay. You’d think that I would learn to lock my computer after the $2,000 Fancy Feast incident of 2009, but nope. Now she’s eyeing this huge ass ball of rubber bands for $2,999.00, so she can bat it around the house and set up a trap to make me run like Indiana Jones outrunning the giant boulder.
Read more “My Cat Wants This: Crazy Insane Giant Rubber Band Ball”
Withered And Aged Humpty Dumpty Mask Will Get You That Senior Discount
Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall. Humpty Dumpty had a great fall. All the kings horses and all the kings men couldn’t put Humpty together again. Maybe that’s because all of the kings horses and all the kings men were a bunch of egg beaters that get off on hurting and bullying beings of the incredible-edible variety until they look like the cracked, withered and beaten mess you see here.
Read more “Withered And Aged Humpty Dumpty Mask Will Get You That Senior Discount”
This Magic Red Beard Met Gene Simmons From KISS
This Ebay seller met Gene Simmons and had the typical screaming fan girl pics taken with him since he was man-crushing uber hard. This guy is giving the thumbs up in the pic and he is all like, “Check it out, I just met Gene Simmons”, while Gene Simmons is all like “I just had my dinner interrupted AGAIN by another weird stalker.” *points* What we are creeped out about is that this dude thought it would rock, to snip off and sell his straggly goatee that he was wearing on the night he met Mr. Simmons. Oh and because he says his goatee has magical powers.
Read more “This Magic Red Beard Met Gene Simmons From KISS”