Tag: home decor

Alien Xenomorph Egg Cushion Pillow

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Alien Xenomorph Egg Cushion Pillow
This Alien Xenomorph Egg Cushion Pillow lets you lay down on the couch and get your damn face hugged into oblivion. Naptime is now nightmare time. Alien eggs. For your couch. Or bed. Or wherever the hell you want to be scared to death. Bonus: If someone tries to grab your pillow, you can say, “Hey! Lego my alien EGGo!” That’s always fun. At least until they hatch. Then your fun wordplay aint shizz! You’re just alien Xenomorph food.

After it eats you, it’s gonna sit on your couch watching Oprah and warm up all of the other eggs until they hatch. Sad really.

Faux Taxidermy Bigfoot

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Faux Taxidermy Bigfoot
When you can’t catch Bigfoot yourself, you buy this Faux Taxidermy Bigfoot. No one will ever know that you didn’t hunt him down. This guy looks like some kind of elder sasquatch who was on his last leg anyway. He would have been easy to kill. “When I was a kid….” Bang! Bagged me a Bigfoot. An old nasty smelly Bigfoot that was headed for retirement anyway. Not sure if I should be sad or happy with this on my wall.

Freaky Dancing Skeleton Dolls

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Freaky Dancing Skeleton Dolls
Do a little dance. Make a little love. Get down tonight! Oh yeah. Look at these boneheaded kids just dancing the night away. They cray cray skeleton dolls. It’s all Saturday Night Dead up in here. I think she’s a flapper, but probably flapping her gums more than anything. He don’t care. He’s gettin some sweet bony love tonight. Some bone on bone action. Which is real actual grinding peeps. They get up and if there’s dust, you know they been at it all night.

Taxidermy Mouse Chess Set

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Taxidermy Mouse Chess Set
Checkmate! More like check pulse. You won’t find any. My dead army just beat your dead army. And if both armies are dead, what the hell is even the point? The Taxidermy Mouse Chess Set lets you play the classic game with a bunch of dead, but very well dressed mice. Sounds like a fun way to keep others away. That reminds me, I have to go check my traps so I can complete my own set.